We will all get to a place where we need to stay “no.” A place where we need to walk away from things that no longer serve us, things with the potential to bring us down. And I’ve been waiting for this moment for a while. I’ve gone through logic and emotions and now it’s time…I’m finally ready.
I’m ready to say goodbye to the friends who have become distant, the friends who are too selfish and self-absorbed to ever even feign interest in my life. The ones who, over time, grew to be much too involved in themselves to even be capable of having a genuine friendship any longer. Friendship, like any relationship, is give and take. You take the bad with the good, you accept and love one another for who you are. But there is a fine line between accepting the so-called “bad” from friends and settling for their less than mediocre effort to contribute to the friendship. There is never a need to settle for what people refuse to give. You cannot change their ways, you cannot make them give more, you cannot change a person. You either accept them or you don’t. It really is as simple as that.
I’m ready to say goodbye to the man I kept in my life for much too long. Ready to fully let him go, completely eliminating any form of contact. I thought we could remain friends after all that he put me through, thought that I could handle it because I cared so deeply for him. I thought I could be supportive in his life ventures that didn’t include having me by his side, but I was wrong, and it took me a while to realize it. But I’m ready now. I’m ready to let him go, to put the memories to rest, to forgive him for the hurt but never forget, to not speak to him again, and to never look back.
I’m ready to say goodbye to the goals and ideas that, although I made valiant efforts to achieve, I’ve realistically come to accept that they will never come to fruition. I’m proud that I gave them my all, but also proud that I’ve recognized it’s time to let them go. There comes a point where we understand that some things truly are not meant to be. We’re not all supposed to get everything we want or have everything come easily without working for it. And even when we work for it, there is never a guarantee of success. We are allowed to dream, to imagine, and to pursue goals, but we need to be realistic about things because life happens. Shit happens. And put simply, we just can’t have it all.
I’m ready to say goodbye to the people who no longer contribute positively to my life…moreover, the people who don’t contribute anything to my life. The people who judge or criticize me for my actions, the people who act superior no matter the situation. I’m done with letting them affect me or enable me to have any sliver of doubt about the life I live. These are people I will choose to walk away from, once and for all.
But to all those who try to make us feel less than, to those who choose to never recognize our value, a toast: “Here’s to you, here’s to me. May we never disagree. But if we do, hell with you. Here’s to me…”
In saying goodbye to these people and ideas in my life, it reiterates the fact that life is made up of different seasons. We go through periods where we accept certain things for the purpose they are supposed to serve in our lives, and then comes the time to let them all go. We get into trouble when we try to hold on to these things that perhaps were meant only to teach us a lesson. Things that were supposed to serve a temporary purpose, and it was our duty to understand and learn from them. No matter how difficult they may have been, no matter how complex, there are lessons in every struggle and in every triumph. We are constantly learning and growing.
Make sure you get to a point where you live your life for you. Not to please and appease others, not because you think your actions will gain you praise and respect. Learn to walk away from what no longer serves you, what no longer brings you joy, what instead brings you pain and self-doubt. Learn to say goodbye, and not look back. You are better than the people who try to bring you down, you are better than the goals and dreams that caused you too much suffering no matter how hard you tried. We have the power to walk away, to choose differently, and to decide how we allow people to treat us because we set that standard. Always remember that life is full of heartaches, things we don’t deserve, but somehow by God’s grace, we always tend to become much stronger because of them.