1. When someone touches your radio while you’re driving.
You’re entitled to threaten someone with physical bodily harm if they touch your radio while you’re driving. You don’t have to justify why you’re subjecting your passengers to Ariana Grande. When you’re behind the wheel, you’re completely in charge of keeping everyone from dying in a fiery wreck and controlling what Top 40 hits will be playing while you provide that service.
2. When you want to break up with someone who doesn’t make you happy.
Sometimes we stay in relationships entirely too long because we don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings or “be mean.” It’s a noble gesture, but sometimes it comes at the cost of our own joy. No one likes being dumped, but your happiness is worth a million uncomfortable conversations, ten thousand passive aggressive text messages, and a dozen “subtle” lyric tweets that are maybe probably about your past relationship.
3. When someone’s eating all your food.
Yeah, it’s just food, but when you skipped lunch in anticipation of some greasy waffle fries and your friend is glomming off of the glorious, golden pile of fried goodness you’ve been looking forward to since 10AM, you’re within your rights to slap his or her hand away. You shouldn’t have to suffer because someone’s regretting their quinoa mac ‘n cheese.
4. When you’re quitting your job.
Depending on how much you love or hate your career, leaving a company (or a job) behind can prompt a lot of weird feelings of guilt, hesitation, and betrayal. It’s even more intense if you plan on quitting during an especially busy time, if you were recently promoted, or if you’re on really good terms with your boss. It might be uncomfortable, but you should always think of yourself first when making decisions about your future. You’re the one that has to live with your resume. It’s always a good time to make the professional changes you want to make.
5. When you need to distance yourself from someone who’s bringing you down.
Maybe there’s someone in your life with a negative attitude. Maybe you have a friend who posts morally reprehensible things on Facebook. Maybe you found out one of your friends sent out an audition tape for Bad Girls Club. Whatever the reason, you don’t need to validate why you need space from someone in your life. If someone’s bringing you down for any reason, you shouldn’t think twice about cutting that anchor.
6. When you go to Victoria’s Secret to get the free panty (and nothing else).
Sometimes you get that little card in the mail and think to yourself, “Do a lot of people really do this? Do I want to be THAT person?” Trust me: a lot of people really do it, and you want to be that person. When Victoria’s Secret is offering you FREE underwear that normally costs eight bucks, you stop asking questions, find your size, and proudly get in line without even buying anything else.
7. When you don’t want to go out.
Every group has a few super social people who like talking and loud music and being out in public in cute outfits, and those people have a way of making you feel like a gross shut-in when you decline one of their many invites to go out on a weeknight. You should never feel obligated to lie about how tired you are or how you need to go to yoga in the morning. The fact that you’d rather catch up on Keeping Up with the Kardashians rather than deal with the madness of $2 beers isn’t anyone’s business.
8. When someone on public transportation thinks his or her bag is more deserving of a seat than you.
We’ve all seen them. They’ve got their expensive headphones on acting as if they aren’t being a total and complete asshole by having their purse/backpack/enormous Barney bag beach tote hogging an entire seat that should be accommodating your own derriere right now. The thought of asking someone to put their personal belongings on the sometimes-disgusting floor of public transit is unpleasant, but you can’t let these people win. Don’t fear the “excuse me” when you still have four more stops before your destination. No Michael Kors bag is more important than you escaping a stranger’s body odor.