How Having Addicts For Siblings Both Ruined And Saved My Life

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An upside down photograph of a blonde-haired woman in a greenhouse
Tanja Heffner / Unsplash

Growing up I was always told to be better. Do better. Live better and Love better. 

Better than who? My siblings.

I have one brother who I look up to and has done well for himself yet the others have continued to disappoint me. Being an addict is hard but being the family of one is even harder. You grow up wondering when or if you’ll see them again. You go months without talking to realize they’re in jail or in rehab. Having this in my life ruined a lot for me.

My family is no longer together, trust issues have settled in, and life can be tough sometimes. There are many things I will never get to have because of this. Some people from my family will not get to celebrate big milestones in my life with me. Such as my graduation, which was last year, my wedding, and even my funeral. Yet seeing how they have ruined their lives has pushed me to succeed.

They saved me. By showing me what not to do they saved me. I knew I didn’t want to be a teen mom, I knew I didn’t want to do drugs and I knew that if I ever have kids I want to be a good parent.

Spite is a powerful thing. It has fueled me to never give up. I have always felt bad for kids who fell in the same ditch their families were in. Children of addicts becoming addicts themselves or siblings sharing the same experiences leading to addiction.

If you see the mistakes they have made in there life push yourself to be different, push yourself to be better and succeed in life in ways they never will.

Prove everyone wrong. Do not let people who know your families issues bring you down. Stay true to yourself and be the black sheep of your family in the best way possible. TC mark

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This is me letting you go

If there’s one thing we all need to stop doing, it’s waiting around for someone else to show up and change our lives. Just be the person you’ve been waiting for.

At the end of the day, you have two choices in love – one is to accept someone just as they are and the other is to walk away.

We owe it to ourselves to live the greatest life that we’re capable of living, even if that means that we have to be alone for a very long time.

“Everyone could use a book like this at some point in their life.” – Heather
Let go now

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