A Broke Bitches Guide To Gift Giving: Friend Edition

freestocks.org
freestocks.org

We all know that when the calendar flips to December, most people and their saving accounts start shaking in their boots. Why? They haven’t budgeted, and it means that they actually have to use actual money to give actual gifts…instead of IOU’s.

So here it is: Broken down by category, your gift guide for the less than monetary blessed:

For the friend that lives beyond her means: Why not make her feel some sort of special? Let her ball out with a GC to Neiman Marcus Last Call. Better yet, YOU ball out at Neiman and get her a Rebecca Minkoff at a quarter of the price. She’ll be kissing your Bass outlet drivers in ultimate thanks. Not a fan of discounted designers? (Me either) Try a candle that smells expensive so she can feel like she’s in the VIP lounge at the 40/4 club. Wait, is that still a thing?

For the friend that’s clever/kind of hipster: Nothing like a pair of earrings to make her feel like she’s edgy and different. If that doesn’t work, try a slightly inappropriate mug because she seriously doesn’t understand her audience. She’ll make sure to drink out of this when she’s with her sister’s kids and feel no remorse for it.

For the friend that’s into passing out in bathrooms: Ah, my favorite. Even though you can give this one a hangover kit, the gift will be gone within 24 hours. Make it last longer, but make it cheap…because it’s guaranteed to be lost within 48 hours. A flask, bottle of alcohol, or a hotline to a self-help line are all viable options as well.

For the friend that’s Martha Stewart: If she has her own place, try a couple things for her kitchen, a ring plate, or a clever door mat. My favorite go-to gift for a first time home owner (apt owner or whatevs) is a personalized cutting board or some really nice coasters. I think the best gifts are experiences: get her a couple of cooking classes, and make sure to go too…because we all know you can’t cook either.

For the friend that’s a wine-o: This is dramatically different than the friend ending up on the bathroom floor. These girls/guys usually just end up in their bed cuddling with their dogs reminiscing about their times in college when they DID end up on the bathroom floor. Trust me, it’s a real type of person. Wine-o’s love a good bottle of their favorite white, red, or blush. But, let’s face it…blush is just for when you’re feeling fancy. There’s such a thing as WINE SOAP..so that’s gross, but it’s an option. Wine glasses, accessories, and wine bags to hide wine in are obvious but always a go to.  A better time would be a trip to a winery. Get a couple people together and buy a bottle of vino.

The best gifts are outside the box. If you aren’t sure, here’s my secret:  STALK their Pinterest page, Facebook page, and what they already own. Don’t over think it, or you’ll over buy. TC mark

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I graduated from SUNY Old Westbury with a major in Sociology, but I have knack for writing. I love people watching ... Read more articles from Kathryn on Thought Catalog.