Things You Need When You’re Sad

Your world is falling apart around you, sort of like that scene from Inception where Juno is learning to build and destroy environments. You’re reverting to your most petulant childish self in response, because when the going gets tough, the tough sometimes take a while to kick-start. If you’re anything like me, here are some of the things you’re going to need to get you through.

Intimacy

There’s something very comforting about physical intimacy, not to mention the endorphins that will kick you in the brain. And it’s all well and good when there’s someone you trust to poke around inside you, but it can end in tears when you find yourself in bed with a stranger at 4 a.m., freak out when you realize you don‘t really want to do what you’re about to do, demand he call a cab, and leave him completely blue-balled. Now there are two sad people.

Mum

When shit hits the fan it can be compounded to an infinite degree when mum is absent. Mum just knows how to do everything… better. Her comfort, cuddles, attentive nuances, cooking, it’s all just better and try as you might you can’t recreate it when she’s not there. And as my mum likes to remind me via Skype, I’m too far away to be her little girl right now, so I have to be a woman. But I say eff that, I just want my mamma!

Chicken Soup

As it turns out chicken soup is food for the soul. Come hail or shine, if illness or fatigue or the vengeful hand of God strikes me down you can be guaranteed I’ll be boiling chicken bones on the hob like the diligent yiayia I will one day be.

Friends

When you’re lonely and without your real friends, Friends is the perfect substitute — especially that Chandler Bing, he always manages to get a giggle out of me when I’m feeling down. This applies to any other TV show you’re so familiar with that the characters feel like family because you know them so well.

Ice Cream and/ or Chocolate

Comfort food is a no brainer. I always wonder what people who don’t like sweets eat when they’re sad — anyone?

Shopping

There is nothing so shallow and cathartic than making an unnecessary purchase when you’re down in the dumps. Buyer’s adrenaline will momentarily take you away from the reality of your situation. On the flipside you will also be poorer, which in the long run might be detrimental to your state, especially if what you’re stressed about is money. Despite the pitfalls, I am a huge advocate of sad shopping. As frivolous as it is, having something pretty and new is a really good pick me up.

Cigarettes

Look I’m not proud of this and I’m not suggesting you do the same, but the first thing I do when disaster strikes is cross the road to the bodega and buy a pack of cigarettes. Why? I don’t know. Maybe I think it makes me look really broody and sexy in a melancholic, poetic sort of way that romanticizes my failures. Or maybe I’m just an idiot who can’t shake a very unhealthy, reflex association. TC mark

image – Helga Webber

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  • Bee

    All of the above.

  • Anne

    “I’m too far away to be her little girl right now, so I have to be a woman.” – Great statement.

  • http://chargold.tumblr.com Charlotte

    What people who don’t like sweets eat when they’re sad: CARBS.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=903990701 Rae Gross

      It’s true, even a piece of buttered bread is amazing when sad.

  • Emily

    “And as my mum likes to remind me via Skype, I’m too far away to be her
    little girl right now, so I have to be a woman. But I say eff that, I
    just want my mamma!”

    Yes, yes,  yes. Every day.

  • http://typewriterpoetry.wordpress.com b r

    lol’d at Juno

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1363230138 Michael Koh

    weed

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1363230138 Michael Koh

    weed

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=834175636 Duy Nguyen

    I’m not a big “sweets” eater, so my usual comfort food go-to is usually fried and fatty foods. Give me a bucket of fried chicken, chicken chipees, (heck! even normal chips), fried shrimp etc.. anything that can be battered or crumbed, and then fried, is good for me.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=903990701 Rae Gross

    French Fries are great when you are sad, ditch the ice cream and bring on the fried (mood enhancing) goodies.

  • star

    A dance party. And maybe alcohol.

  • Anonymous
  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=547215219 Ninna Marie Ottey

    I’m agree with everything except for cigarettes…Maybe an intimate Karaoke with your friends…and a lot of alcohol!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Steven-Timberman/922794 Steven Timberman

    I feel like you limit your scope by comparing your “sad” to some guy who just didn’t get laid that night. I mean, other parts of this had me nodding, then laughing, then contemplating things.

    But that opening bit feels like a missed opportunity. Then again… a reference to Chandler is always welcome. 

  • http://twitter.com/CowboySandtoes Cowboy Santos

    mum? hahahaa. deal with it bitch

    • Just Saying

      Somebody’s mom clearly didn’t hug them enough…

  • http://twitter.com/CowboySandtoes Cowboy Santos

    here is some of mine: 
    walk, outside. sunshine. vitamins. exercise. sleep. music, pref rock shit that makes you feel tough AF. like AC/DCs Stiff Upper Lip.try to be sad after that, and you might be depressed 

  • bored w this

    This is just idiotic.  I’m sorry, but it just is.

  • Steph

    Intimacy wont work if that’s your problem. Which is my problem now. It doesn’t help when all you want is the affection of one person.

    • Anonymous

      Holler at that.

  • Tot-nibbler

    What people who don’t like sweets eat when they’re sad: BABIES.

  • http://www.facebook.com/grc15r Gregory Costa

    How did a “small animal to torture” not make the list?

    • http://www.facebook.com/grc15r Gregory Costa

      In all seriousness, a good run.  That gets my endorphins going because I’m sure as hell not getting intimacy.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_6IFPDSFKEQJE2ZPP3ASE35MRL4 Laura

      uhhh…’scuse me?

  • Anonymous
  • Amy

    just drug yourself to sleep with some benadryl. wake up happy.

  • Mandatory

    i don’t really like sweets so when i’m sad i eat chips with mayo or mdma

  • http://twitter.com/tannnyaya Tanya Salyers

    Milano cookies (I hate sweets and chocolates) are surprisingly the best thing to get me out of a funk, oh and Marlboro Lights…

  • https://twitter.com/iamthepuddles Jordana Bevan

    cigarettes. cursed conditioning :(

  • https://twitter.com/iamthepuddles Jordana Bevan

    cigarettes. cursed conditioning :(

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