She was never the Regina George or the Carrie Bradshaw. Guys do not look twice when they see her on the street. Whenever they do this, she feels that she has something on her face or stuck between her teeth. She has always been the gawky chic- Awkward has always been her thing until she bloomed one day (after her rhinoplasty).
Today, she’s dealing with 5 different guys that she knows she is leading on. She calls all of them baby (sometimes sweetie), dates them, hangs out with their friends, sleeps with them and converses with them like they are the only person that matters. There are days when all of these guys will simultaneously tell her that they love her and she will just reply with that kissing emoticon sending a heart, hoping that they will see this as her reciprocating the feeling that they are sending.
In a world where people are always looking for someone to share their hearts with, it is both a blessing and a curse to be in her situation. Maybe she is a feminist believing that women have all the right to be as polygamist as men can. Maybe it’s because she doesn’t believe that she is worthy of love. Maybe it is because she had always wanted to feel the attention she never experienced.
Maybe it is because she wanted to know what it is like to have someone to share special moments with and wasn’t sure if one will be enough. Maybe she still isn’t sure of what she ultimately wants so deciding now will be the end of her new lease on life. Maybe, she wanted to keep her options open because she’s still hoping that the right one will come along soon enough, the one that will make her change everything that she now believes in. Maybe, she still believes in love and is afraid to admit it.
In a world where dating someone can be as quick as changing from day to night, an era of loving someone for only 24 hours- life can be an irony of ease and complications. In an age where in we long for intimacy (Psychosocial stages of development), isolating ourselves from opening up to someone can be the fastest way to go. Leading guys on is easier than investing all the love in the world for someone you are not sure of. But are we ever sure of anything in this world? Aren’t mysteries and unanswered riddles as common as certainties?
Think about how similar our lives are- you and me. How good and terrible does it feel to be on the opposite side of each spectrum?