Lately, it feels like “being afraid” is the only way I can label my emotions. Afraid of making big mistakes that will somehow mess my life up. My fear of mistakes is making me sit out on life’s greatest experiences and lessons. I don’t know about you but for me, it’s like I am staring tirelessly out of the bus window watching life pass me by like the trees one right after the other. I stare out the window as the daylight fades to night-time, I haven’t yet moved from my spot on my bed, and there goes another day of not living because I am absolutely terrified of messing up.
I miss being a child when there wasn’t so much self-awareness when we weren’t so caught up in the minor detail. The days when all we heard was our hearts beating fast in our chests from all the excitement of adventure. Only when it was over did we sit back and think “ oh I probably shouldn’t have done that.” The days when we only went off feeling, emotion, and intuition. Our parents would ask us why we don’t like someone and we would simply answer “ because I don’t like them.” As children, we never over analyzed a situation planning out the infinite number of outcomes.
As we have grown up we have been conditioned to think over feel every time. Over the last few years, I started to live and experience life and some of those experiences ended badly and made me instantly categorize them as mistakes and then completely shut down again and cease living life. Our parents would look into our innocent eyes as children and say “ as long as you learned something from this experience then it was not a mistake.”
Life is meant to be lived, with good and bad experiences. Our lives are built up of both and balanced out with the stories we share to help others out. This is for me and all of you let’s stop being so damn afraid of living.