Murmurs

With his head on my chest I feel
my pulse poke at his cheek—
a not-so-subtle reminder that
I am.

He looks up at me
in panicked discovery

“There’s an extra bah-dum” he says.
“It goes bah-dum-bahdumbadhum” he explains.
It’s a heart murmur, I tell him.

It’s been like that since before I knew you,
and it will be like that after.

I remind myself.

Sullen, he returns his cheek to the beat
and adds his palm to my chest as if he could
slow it down, save
me. 

It’s the other murmurs he should worry about.

I never tell him.

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