Outside The City


Don’t you ever feel like doing something completely and utterly out of your comfort zone? Something that you have never done before in your well-practiced everyday life? But then in the middle of deciding whether or not to act on your impulse – you chicken out because of weighing the pros and cons several times? Yeah, well I don’t blame you. There is something about city life that makes people too cautious.

Thank god I wasn’t in the city that night.

The vibe was amazing. For a couple of hours, we had alter-egos. People you never would have gotten along with on a regular day were your new best friends. People who you found to be dull and unattractive were suddenly the most vibrant human beings on the planet. People that could be considered ultimate introverts were up and shamelessly dancing to the beat. They were all dancing to music which would have sounded much more ordinary back home. Only we weren’t home.

We were in an isolated piece of paradise.

Everything about that night made me feel invincible; as if I could do something, anything unexpected. It was like I could take a gamble on any bet – and win. I had a feeling in my gut that there was an adventure to be had. But then again, there could have just been something shady in the alcohol.

“It doesn’t have to be anything more than what it will be here.” The words slipped out of my mouth before the rational side of my brain could even begin to process what was going on. Then I watched his expression go from absolute surprise to casual contemplation.

Back in the city, the fact that he was even considering my all-too blunt proposal would have been a victory in itself. But we weren’t anywhere near there, and I made sure to remind him of that.

“It could be our thing.” He answered – referring to the annual event that we were currently in the middle of. I suppose he, too, was fed up with the uptight, judging society we had been conforming to until that night.

He wanted to take a risk too. I could see it.

The next thing I knew, we had lost ourselves in the crowd but at the same time, had not. We were surrounded by unfamiliar faces but it still felt so oddly intimate. Then everything began to escalate. The energy, the heat, the sensation of every beat, every bump, every touch. All of it.

I don’t remember exactly how fast it happened.

But I do remember throwing up.

All the confidence boosters I had been taking earlier had suddenly decided that I probably did not need their help anymore. They made a prompt retreat. Take note that in the city or not, vomiting is no less pleasant. Thankfully, chivalry still seemed to exist no matter where we were. He remained a complete gentleman despite my horrendous gag-reflex.

I excused myself to go get cleaned up, and a part of me considered that as being the end of my little escapade. I was disappointed and terribly upset with myself. I had never even considered that I would be the cause of my own demise.

I returned some time later, and he was still there.

Utter surprise is the only way I can describe my reaction. I suppose he was not ready to go back to the real world. Which was good, because neither was I.

“So where do we go from here?” He asked.

A pause. “Do you want to try something risky right now?” I smiled. A hint of curiosity glinted in his eye. I took that as a yes.

We lost ourselves once more, just as it began to rain in that isolated piece of paradise. It rained really hard, actually. I didn’t care. We didn’t care. This was a place where normal rules did not apply, where I could be what I wanted, do what I wanted – with no fear of consequences. I was lost in that moment and could have stayed there forever.

I wanted to remain in the adventure I had been looking for.

But the sky grew bright, like a rude awakening. The world was calling me back to it, reminding me that my life was still out there. Reminding me that there was a place where rules did apply, where I could possibly be what I wanted and do what I wanted – but only with appropriate consequences.

He could hear it too. His life, calling him back.

We had no choice but to answer. I did it slowly, rather begrudgingly, but with not a single hint of regret. I had taken a gamble and won big. I had done something entirely out of character and it didn’t kill me. For a few hours, I had been invincible. There was nothing to feel disappointed about. If anything, I wanted more nights like this.

I felt hooked – no, determined to have more nights like this.

Right now, I am back home, writing about this. But I am still trying to keep that motivation, that risk-taking mindset from that time. It is notably difficult, but not impossible. Adventures can be found in the most unlikely places. The key is to never stop looking for them, and I will not stop.

You should try it too. It’s a damn good feeling.

There is something about being outside the city that can make you reckless, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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