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I Still Choke From Memories Of You

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i still choke from
memories of you,
my lips tremble
from stopping
myself from whispering
your name,
and my body shakes
from when my heart
couldn’t help
but call out to you.
your absence
bored a hole down
my chest that i can
never fill with
all those sleepless nights
i still thought of you.

to be honest,
there are mornings
when it gets too much,
when i couldn’t pull
myself out of bed
because i swear,
i swear i can almost
feel your arms wrapped
around me and
i can almost remember
what it
was like before
but then,
cold sheets
and the empty
side of the bed
are painful
reminders of what
i have lost.
i wake up each morning
with a stinging
slap of the cold, hard
truth that you
are gone.
and you will never
be back. TC mark

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