Many states placed their capitals far from major cities, like Albany in New York, so that government officials wouldn’t be affected by business interests. That’s actually interesting, right? All most of us learned from the state capitals was that education is entirely trivial. And that Albany exists.
Doctors say children need more sleep than adults. That’s why, five days a week, we wake them up when the sun is still shining in China.
Our parents aren’t afraid of technology — they’re on Facebook, they’ve got cellphones — yet somehow they still use Internet Explorer 6. They still think “opening a tab” means drinking diet soda.
It can be hard to find a table with an outlet though, and I need one to plug in my MacBook Pro — there’s no point in meeting at a coffee shop if I can’t use my computer.
It may be hard to believe, but “I’m your biggest fan,” is about the least impressive thing you can say to someone who hears it almost constantly — in fact, I’m pretty sure the guy in front of you just said exactly that, and he’s got the tattoo to prove it.
Read SkyMall; become convinced the key to happiness is a dedicated hot dog toaster.
Everyone I know looks like an uglier version of some celebrity.
But now that every person with a smart phone has instant access to every bit of human knowledge, not only do you have to be right 100% of the time, you have to be right with stunning accuracy.
Baseball players are highly trained and highly skilled athletes, capable of stunning feats of strength and precision. And many of them do it with a beer belly.
Ever since the dawn of civilization, 20-somethings have been united by their faith in one true goal. They keep this at the forefront of their minds by reciting the following mantra: I will find a job and not be a complete failure. I will find a job and not be a complete failure.