There will be many people in your life who become more than general acquaintances, the ones who stick around long after brief hellos and awkward exchanges. Whether it’s their quick humor, their obvious sincerity or simply the comfortable easiness you have when around them, we inadvertently end up spending our time with the people we’ve identified as close friends, buddies, or comrades.
The ones who catch a late night movie with you, the crowd you surround yourself with at happy hours, the people who are always a part of your never-ending group emails (whether we like those darn chains or not). However, there are specific changes that occur when you subconsciously promote your casual let’s-grab-lunch-sometime-next-week-pal to the all-inclusive title, The Best Friend. When you’ve hit all these marks, you know you’ve found the chosen one who meets all the requirements of the critically acclaimed best friend status. In the wise words of a young Beyoncé, it’s time to upgrade ya.
Persistent communication through every social media imaginable.
No longer restricted to weekly check ins, you two gab nonstop about which shoes to buy and where you should go to dinner tomorrow night and oh my god that cute coworker just brushed my elbow and I think I drooled a little bit. The filter has disintegrated, along with any underlying rules of double texting. You have no qualms about leaving her seven messages in the middle of the night.
You’ve become a constant in each other lives, always available for insight and advice at any given moment. She’s your back up, your safety net, your emergency contact. And how could she possibly wake up tomorrow morning not knowing that you went on an Etsy shopping spree at 2am to get you both matching handmade knit socks? Priorities. You share everything…and then some.
Two of a kind, peas in a pod, whatever cliché that simply means you’re each other’s plus one.
If one of you is invited somewhere, it is automatically assumed the other will be your sidekick. Weddings, work functions, happy hours…others now view you as a duo. You always check in with each other before committing to an event to make sure you won’t be (gasp) solo.
Even when you’re in a relationship, you’re still each other’s go-to for everything your significant other would roll his eyes at. While your schedules may vary here and there, this friendship is worth the time and effort it takes to maintain it, despite changing circumstances. While some pals might fall to the wayside, you do what it takes to keep your sisterly bond alive.
Merging interests (you had no idea you could love vegan food so much)
Perhaps you weren’t really a fan of indie folk music and those dirty concert festivals weren’t really your thing, but your partner in crime is dying to see Arctic Monkeys for the 17th time. Somehow you find yourself first in line waving your Lollapalooza tickets above your head for all to see simply because it is a blast spending time with your number one, no matter where you are.
The great thing about your companionship is that she’s opened you up to so many new activities. In return, she’s now there to share in yours. She’s always willing to watch that obscure documentary you’re desperate to see and will accompany you to that awkward work dinner you’re too shy to attend alone. You get to relish in her silly traditions while simultaneously sharing all the quirks that make you all the more interesting.
..But you still have your differences
Despite seemingly being joined at the hip, you still participate in separate activities. There is no binding obligation that you must be invested in every single hobby and interest of the other’s. You may rather watch HGTV while she’s scanning for Real Housewives of Whatever episodes, and that will never change. While you have the common interests that bonded you together in the first place, the difference of opinions on a multitude of topics keeps conversation fascinating. Besides, a little disparity keeps you on your fighting edge, always nodding your head in agreement can be a real bore.
Plane tickets are booked months in advance
Trips to the California coast, decorating ideas for your new apartment, or simply planning ahead for Mexican food next week. A best friend is someone you map out a future investment in. Whether it’s buying plane tickets for a getaway next spring or just making reservations a week ahead of time, you know it’s more than a fleeting camaraderie, you can sense that your adventures together are only beginning. While many friendships seem to fade away as soon as a new significant other enters the picture or you’re starting a new job or you’re just too-busy-to-keep-up-with-those-weekly-phone-call-dates, a best friend knows that, although there may be waves of your time together, you actively seek each other out to have stand next to you forever after…despite expected, and unexpected, life changes.
It’s the person who shares in your singleton but is also there to see you down the aisle (and vice versa), the one who splits burritos with you when you’re flat broke but is also there pop the expensive champagne celebrating your fancy job promotion. She’s not just there for the easy part, for the convenient and well-situated companionship, but she’s there for the roller coaster ride, the highs as well as the lows. This, the dependability that can be sought after in the darkest nights and sunniest days, is the surest sign that you’re not only best friends, you’re best friends forever.