30 Insults That Will Make You Sound Classy And Intelligent

Instead of cursing someone out the next time you’re angry, try these intellectual insults from Ask Reddit.

A classy, intelligent girl laughing
Unsplash /
Hian Oliveira

1. 

“I can only explain it to you. I can’t understand it for you.” — amperages

2.

“I envy everyone you have never met.” — TheGarp

3.

“You’re like the end pieces of a loaf of bread. Everyone touches you, but nobody wants you.” — Tartaras1

4.

“You’re not pretty enough to be that stupid.” — sinan810 

5.

“I would love to insult you but I’m afraid I won’t do it as well as nature did.” — AnonCaptain002

6.

“Somewhere out there, there’s a tree whose single purpose on earth is to replace the oxygen you waste. Go find it and apologize.” — Alcho_Duck 

7.

“I have neither the time nor the crayons to explain this to you.” — UlicBelouve

8.

“Are you naturally this dumb or do you have to put in effort?” — TheToucanKing

9.

“You consistently set low expectations and fail to achieve them.” — Merv_86

10.

“Just quit being yourself.” — allmusiclover69

11.

“I hope you lose weight so there’ll be less of you!” — bobapplemac

12.

“Anyone who ever said they loved you lied.” — chileheadd

13.

“I hope your day is filled with people like you.” — Adamdidit

14.

“You’re hard to look at.” — AudibleNod

15.

“If only your mother had swallowed you instead…” — HappyLittleTrees17

16.

“If I wanted to kill myself, I’d climb up your ego, and jump to your IQ.” — Saoirse_Laochra

17.

“I refuse to enter a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent.” — snugalufalus

18.

“You spit in the face of evolution.” — Fishing_Croagunk

19.

“Even dogs don’t like you.” — Av3ngedAngel 

20.

“Life is full of disappointments, just ask your parents.” — cmdrmcgarrett

21.

“When your mom dropped you off at school, she got a fine for littering.” — crabshit

22.

“Not saying I hate you, but I would unplug your life support to charge my phone.” — Alcho_Duck

23.

“You’re the poster child for Birth Control.” — Rockwell87

24.

“You are like the sun, not because you light up my world but because it hurts to look at you.” — PenguinsAreTheSenate

25.

“You better die on a weekday, because no one will break their weekend plans to attend your funeral.” — triton2toro

26.

“Whoever told you to be yourself simply couldn’t have given you worse advice.” — ElVille55

27.

You shouldn’t act hard-to-get when you’re hard-to-want.” — InarticulateAtheist

28.

“Now I know why everyone talks about you behind your back.” — drsp00kz 

29.

“People tolerate you.” — McCyanide

30.

“You’re about as useful as a screen door in a submarine.” — [deleted] Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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