I am 23, much like many of you reading this.
Blink-182 once truthfully sang, “Nobody likes you when you’re 23…”
I found myself texting my friend the other day, “Is everyone in their 20’s just as confused as we are?”
When you’re younger, you think everything will work out just right, that you’ll become an astronaut, dentist, nurse, movie star, or teacher. You think that every career is simple and attainable, or quite the opposite; you’re thoroughly delusional and believe your knight in shining armor will come rescue you from the deadly fire-breathing dragon as you wail and scream from the window of your towering, ivory castle. But in actuality, nobody ever really tells you what growing up is like, that it’s challenging, that it’s utterly confusing. That sometimes, it’s complete bullshit.
It’s more than likely you can relate.
But I would venture to say that our 20’s are invaluable.
People say that the choices you make in high school and college determine who you will become. I would like to rebuttal that by doing what Socrates did best: ask questions. Aren’t your twenties when you make the most important decisions in your life? Aren’t those the years that you decide who you want to be? Isn’t the second decade one’s existence dedicated to making the most life-altering choices that change the trajectory of your life?
Maybe our twenties are more pivotal than we would care to admit.
And that freaks us out.
That maybe the pithy, idiotic, we-should-be-more-mature-than-this choices we make on a day-to-day basis, matter.
When you graduate college, you proudly walk across the stage and receive the most expensive piece of paper you’ve ever held in your trembling hands. You did it.
Then you immediately think, That’s it?
Yep, it sure is.
It’s highly anticlimactic.
You instantaneously realize that everything about your life at that point in time is unsteady, changing, wavering, and altogether uncertain.
You lowkey don’t mind.
But internally, questions and insecurities arise.
What the hell am I supposed to do now?
Where do I go?
Who am I?
The last four years were planned out.
And now, all of a sudden, no one makes decisions for you anymore.
It’s just you. And a big, open world.
And that’s as hopeful as it is scary.
If used correctly, fear can be a great motivator.
Long-story-short, I graduated college in May. I worked an amazing job, had a wonderful church, and a few close friends. In the beginning of December, I was told that my company was closing and everyone was losing their jobs. At the time, this seemed devastating. But that didn’t last long; two days later, I was invited to live and work in Costa Rica.
This is the opportunity of a lifetime.
I’ve wanted to teach abroad for 6 years.
Life’s a cruel joke. Why is it that when your dream job hits you in the face, you crouch back in terror, second-guess yourself, and think of all the reasons why not to go?
I wish nothing more than to accomplish my goals and achieve my vision, but the demon inside me screams, you’re being ludicrous, financially unwise, and ridiculously unreasonable. You think you’re a dreamer? Who are you kidding? You’re not that brave – you can’t do this – cut the bull.
Dreams are irrational and illogical – that’s why their called that, right?
The more I doubt it, the more I think it’s nonsensical for me to go; but I want this more than anything…and somehow that makes sense.
Just thinking about it makes my heart burst inside my chest.
I’m doing this.
I’m about to live my dream, and I’m freaking out.
I don’t know where life finds you, but I hope it’s somewhere between a rock and a hard place, a crucial time in your existence in which you have a difficult decision to make. One that could transform and revise the course of your life, that could lead you to wholeness and happiness.
Because after all, your 20’s are for living your dream, right?