Even Though I’m Not Easy To Love, I Still Deserve it

 Christopher Campbell
Christopher Campbell

To be honest I am hard to love and I don’t make it easy for someone to love me. The truth is I am wild, free, and emotional 24/7 and for what guys think is cute in the beginning, please don’t tell me in the relationship months later that it’s annoying when you originally found that trait cute when we were dating.

I feel things on a deeper level and have been deemed crazy; a word I despise.

I present myself in the truest form, it’s a way to sweep through all the annoying F**k boys that cross into my path and find the true ones that want to be my friend or lover. My attitude is who I am, a pair of traits passed down from my parents that has made me a headstrong, stubborn woman.

I am stubborn and harsh, I call myself a realist and often border the negative aspect of life most of the time. I don’t forgive easily or want to apologize when I know I am wrong. But that doesn’t mean I am someone mean woman walking around heartless most of the time and deserve to be treated like trash. I just have a hard time letting go of simple things and while I am trying to work on it, the reality of the situation is out there and I don’t pretend to hide it.

I am loud and outgoing, raised in New York my attitude matches my hometown. I am not afraid to tell you how it is and be the woman who stands out in the crowd, wanting to be different from the rest.

I am the puzzle that has been broken into thousands of pieces and only the patient of people can sit and fix the holes I have undone.

The ones who sit and listen and tell me that everything is going to be all right, even when I have nagged them the dreaded “am I going to be all right?!”

But this doesn’t mean I don’t deserve love, because the ones who are the hardest to love are the ones who need it the most.

I have a huge heart, I am loyal, honest and a friend to those who need one most. I don’t judge because my problems are mine and I understand that someone might be feeling the same way.

I own being hard to love and you should too. There is this pride in knowing what you are and who you are, it also makes it that more special when you find the one to put up with your crazy ass.

Tyrion Lannister said it best: “Once you’ve accepted your flaws, no one can use them against you.”  TC mark

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