We’ve all had our fair share of jerks, but what happens when you get too involved with someone to just simply let them go? I can think of a million people who have been down this road before (including myself), and I want to prevent people from getting too infatuated with the wrong guy. Here are eight of the biggest red flags.
1. He says he wants to be with you, but he doesn’t want to make it public.
This is the biggest red flag of them all. As much as you want to believe that he wants his privacy with you, what he’s really saying is that he’s either embarrassed by you or is talking to multiple other girls. These are the words of a liar. Wait for actions that show you he’s the real deal, and if he won’t budge, walk away.
2. He never texts you midday; it’s always at an absurd hour like 3AM.
Despite what he says, no, he wasn’t thinking about you all day, and yes, he is booty-calling you. This can be tricky, especially if you like him, but if he REALLY wanted to spend time with you, he would have reached out by noon. As corny as it is, the people whom we develop feelings for are always on our minds. We want to talk to them all day every day, so if he really did like you as much as he claims he does, why does he keep texting you at inappropriate times? Because he doesn’t take you seriously, and you need to move on.
3. He texts you from across the room at parties.
I hate this one. It’s not cute, ever. It’s rude and annoying. He’s not doing it to be funny, he’s doing it to find some sketchy plans with a nice girl without having to look her in the eye. If this happens to you next time, walk up to that piece of sh*t’s friends and tell them. Their reactions are always priceless, and I can assure you that they won’t let him live it down.
4. He doesn’t save your number.
When guys do this, they are blatantly saying, “You are not important.” If you text someone you’ve been hooking up with and get a reply message saying, “Who is this?,” run for the fucking hills. I don’t care how hot he is or how much he claims to like you, he doesn’t. I still have the contacts of people I haven’t spoken to since the 7th grade. He’s not worried that anyone will see it on his phone; he just doesn’t think you’re worth taking up space on his contact list.
5. He only asks you to hang out if he can get drunk/high first.
It is such a turnoff when guys cannot act normally around girls when they’re sober. Shyer guys tend to do this, but you won’t get anywhere with a relationship that starts out this way.
6. He tells you that he wants to be with you, not his current girlfriend.
You shouldn’t be talking to anyone who is taken. Maybe he really does want to be with you instead, but unless he mans up and does something about it, you shouldn’t be wasting your time. And if he’s doing this behind his current girlfriend’s back, what makes you think he won’t do it to you?
7. His friends tell you that you deserve better.
If his friends are telling you to stay away from him, they’re doing it for your own good. Obviously they respect you enough to give you a heads-up on their best bud’s tendencies. Some may call it betrayal, but in the end it saves everyone some huge headaches. So listen to them. They know him better than anyone.
8. He makes rude remarks about other girls behind their backs.
What makes you think that he wouldn’t say such things behind your back, too? The worst is when he insults your friends. You’d think that most guys know not to do this, but they don’t. Sometimes they think it’ll bring you closer to them if they can get rid of your “annoying” girls. As my literature professor used to say, “Never forget that friendships last a whole lot longer than many of the love relationships you’ll have.”