To say that heartbreak is painful is an understatement. Heartbreak is agonizing, excruciating and everything else that’s known to be horrible. To have your heart broken means that you opened it up to someone and showed them the most vulnerable side of you.
You found someone you deemed worthy and gave them your all. They were somebody who you felt potentially was your forever. They were your shot at the “perfect love” scenario and for whatever reason it is now just a memory. They weren’t ready for you or the feelings didn’t go both ways. Whatever it may be, here you are, picking up the pieces of your heart that they so easily shattered.
Now you lay in the dark and let the tears silently stream down your face. You are begging the dull pain in your chest to stop and at the same time, you are praying that your mind will be quiet for 5 minutes. Five minutes of peaceful silence is all you’re asking for and it seems to be too much.
You are exhausted from the lack of sleep; you could use more than a few hours with no interruptions or nightmares that torment you. You find yourself in this weird state that is constantly between being awake and being asleep, it’s almost zombie like.
You go through the motions of your day but when you get home, you don’t remember any of the specifics. Everything you do is on autopilot and at this moment, you are doing everything you can just to survive.
While we are both here in the deep trenches of heartbreak, and believe me when I tell you that I’m right there next to you battling my own battle, I’m going to throw out an idea. What if there is someone out there for us who will make us forget everyone who came before? Maybe we need to take this time to heal and really make it about finding ourselves again. It’s time we silence the negative thoughts in our head and push forward to something greater; self-love and whatever else that may come along with it.
Experiencing heartbreak floods a mix of emotions through us for many reasons. Every emotion, good or bad, has an agenda and needs to be felt. Accept it or change it, but don’t deny it. Make a list. Either mentally or physically, write out everything you want to accomplish independently and start working towards checking things off. A couple friends of mine have this big canvas picture hanging up in their living room. It’s a bunch of colorful paint splatter and across the canvas, in big glitter letters; it says “My life is dope because I do dope shit”.
We all should have this picture because it’s a reminder that we are the ones who decide what kind of life we have. Get out there and go on adventures and do amazing things so you will live an amazing life. Keep yourself so busy that it will take a special person to make you look twice. Remember, people are not what complete us, they merely add to what we create.
It’s at the point where you become whole by yourself that you will find the person who deserves you. When the two of you find each other, it’s going to be as if everything fell together perfectly. You won’t be forcing anything like you have previously. It will feel natural and in your already amazing, bad ass life, you will just have one more reason to smile.
The person you find will add so much happiness that you won’t remember how you feel at this very moment in time. The dull pain you feel just by breathing will be a distant memory. All this time of feeling like your life was falling apart will be forgotten because you will be consumed by the right kind of love.
It will be the kind of love that is selfless, ongoing and everything that you deserve. It will be so great and worth the wait, you will be thanking your previous heartbreaks for breaking you enough to allow you to rebuild yourself how you needed to be. What will have seemed to have been one of the worst things to ever have happened to you will be the reason you were in the direction of the best thing that will ever happen to you.
Listen to me when I say to wait for the person who makes you forget everyone who came before. It will be the best decision you have ever made.