Sarcastic Women Can Be Vulnerable Too

I can be the first to admit that I keep a straight face when it comes to those touching commercials about abused animals that need a home. Cue the Sarah McLachlan music: doo-bee-dah-bee-dah-bee-day…

I’m not one to choose a sappy romantic drama to watch on Netflix as my first choice. And I don’t divulge about my past unsuccessful relationships as a conversation starter on a first date. Unless I add some humor to the story by making it seem like I wasn’t hurt at all. Who doesn’t?

I’m fluent in sarcasm and I’m quite dry. Actually, very dry. My monotone voice may not make you weak in the knees but my sarcasm is something to nod your head at, or better yet, laugh at. Most people would call it “negativity” instead.

As many Pinterest quotes like to remind us, our past experiences shape us; we make certain decisions based on what we know to be the best decision for us at the time. Whether it’s a breakup, a sudden death, a lost job, or a new town, we learn from those situations and act accordingly hoping for either different or better results if and when similar situations happen again. 

But is being a little sarcastic going to change the outcomes of those situations? No. I get it, you’re attitude has much to do with how you view said outcomes, but it doesn’t take away from the fact that sarcastic women can feel just as emotional as any woman who isn’t. Simply expressing those feelings differently.

I like to occasionally listen to lyrically-driven emotional ballads when I’m feeling melancholic or sad. Sometimes I’m sad for no reason at all (some reasons would most likely include PMS, but let’s not be stereotypical here, okay people?). But I also catch myself staring at the cute couple kissing on the subway with this distasteful look on my face. Young love, we get it but like, can you not?

The thing is, sarcastic women have souls. Like candy with a tough exterior but an unexpected yet delicious surprise center. How sweet.  

I can’t listen to Ellie Goulding’s “Explosions” without crying (EVERY FUCKING TIME). My tear ducts can go zero to a hundred while reading a poem when I can’t process it any other way. And I can get discouraged when I finally open up to someone and they’re all like, “this is weird, you being emotional. Stop it.”

I know what heartbreak feels like. I’m not new to the game. But I also know how to laugh when I look back on all of those heartbreaks after some time passes by. Some longer than others. I know how to see things with new eyes accompanied by a sarcastic opinion and a touch of hope thrown in there for good measure.

See? It’s not always “negative.” In a way, sarcasm is our way of seeing things realistically. The odds of our personal rom-com unraveling just like The Notebook are slim to negative ten. Sorry, Noah, but I didn’t get any of your love letters because there weren’t any in the first place. You’re over me and I’m dying inside. End scene.

You wouldn’t expect me to feel the same way as the discouraged heroine when she gets dumped by her boyfriend. Or to get nervous when I tell my crush, “Hey I really like you and I hope you feel the same way. I want this…please don’t make fun of me for expressing myself.” Or to even hope for a happy ending. But I do, no matter how sarcastic my view might seem to others.

Sarcastic women have feelings too, and express them in a variety of different ways. If anyone thinks we won’t get anywhere “with an attitude like that,” throw them shade. Then cry, build a bridge, move on, and make fun of Noah. We don’t need him anyway.