I know that we all make mistakes. More importantly, I know that we have to learn to forgive if we have any intention of moving on, of letting go of the past.
But that’s the thing that gets me about you. Is that I thought you were going to be different. I thought that finally, my heart was in the right place at the right time.
I never had any intention of being wrong. Of being wrong for you. In my mind, everything was going to work out just this once. And when it all fell apart, I could have sworn that it was falling together.
I fought hard for everything. I fought harder for you than I even knew I was capable of.
But you didn’t see it.
So, the truth is you were not a starting point. You were not the good that outweighed the bad. Really, when I think about it now, I should have known that you were going to be closer to nothing than anything else.
Maybe you couldn’t be. Maybe you didn’t want to be. Maybe it wasn’t you at all but it falls all on me. Whatever the reason, I just wanted to let you know that now I know that you were only an end.
You were only another lesson. Another piece of my heart to give out and to never see again.
I hope you know that I forgive you. I release you from whatever daydreams I originally had. I don’t want to love you on my own. And that’s what this has turned into. Me, by myself, hoping that maybe one day you’ll come to your senses and love me the way I deserve.
But I’m not going to wait on that.
I would have if I wasn’t so good at protecting myself. If I didn’t know how to quit when it was quitting time.
I just wanted to let you know that with you, I really thought that we had something good. Something worth starting over for. I was wrong. But then so were you.
Just remember that I had all the faith in you. And all you could do was run away.
For that, I won’t easily forgive you.