Relationships have been made complicated, for a million reasons. 20-somethings though, have butchered and tossed the traditional concepts of dating, and relationships. What we’ve done is “re-invent” the terms of what relationships are, or what they should be – while justifying one’s desire to simply not have one – as if it’s a crime to not want a relationship. And like anything re-invented by a 20-something or Generation-Y-er, in the process of it all – we’ve lost credibility in a lot of ways from select groups. Particularly, people who fall outside of those groups. Even worse is the fact that many 20-somethings have given up on dating, and relationships entirely. To many, it simply seems like relationships are failing.
But, I’m here to remind everyone that we’re not failing. In fact, we manage our relationships flawlessly – there’s just one problem. Our most stable relationships are not with people, but rather, they’re with things. I’m not going to try and reinvent the wheel here, either. This is not a piece condemning the way 20-somethings live their lives, or showing the yellow-brick road to a stable, happy, and most importantly – healthy – relationship. You’re on your own for that. This is simply a piece to show that we do some relationships, just fine.
Like your first true love, or a prostitute, you’ve shelled out that $8 a month with pride. The icon on your smart device, sits like a first date photo on your desk at work to let everyone know that you’re with Netflix for the long-haul. You’ve graduated passed the days of simply having Netflix on your computer, and watching only movies. Now, you share original series’, and synchronization across all your devices. Netflix has been there through it all, too. The good days, the bad days – rain, or shine – the movie nights, and even the post-breakup binge watching some indulge in.
This is the relationship that you know will always be there. See, you learned from Myspace – and know now that you don’t have to see each other all the time, and you can even see others while with Facebook. Facebook doesn’t mind, either. Go ahead, and login daily if you wish – or cut back to once every few days, or even weeks. Hell, give her up entirely if you wish for Lent – she won’t care. When you log back in, she will be there waiting for you – with open arms – and the same newsfeed you grew to love in the first place.
High-maintenance, and unruly – Twitter is the sorority girl that everyone wants to date – right until you actually date them. Fun to be with, but the hash-tagging almost took things a little too far. But, you’re there. Defending, and using through thick and thin – hash-tagging all the while. You’ll put up with her because she’s the one everyone cares about. But, she just reaffirms your love for Facebook. Nothing will ever be as low-maintenance as she.
She’s the self-esteem booster. Take a #selfie, add some hashtags, and she will be there with hundreds of strangers willing to like, and spam comment your picture. She doesn’t try too hard, either. She simply is herself. Take her, or leave her – she won’t mind. But, there you’ve been – using for probably a year, or more now – look at you – all grown up, and committed.
Talk about reinventing yourself. Snapchat came along, and completely reinvented sharing #selfies. Just plain fun. And you use it like crazy. Hell, add some filters and now you can take all of your #seflies in one place, save them in one place, and send them off after drawing on them – post filtering – and have them ready to be shared on Instagram, and Facebook. Snapchat knows what you want, and even through a somewhat shaky and sketchy launch of an application update with new features, you’re still down.
Back in the day, you never thought you’d pay for music. Well, Napster is gone – and look at what you’re doing. $10 a month, for all the music, and ability to save all the music – you could ever want. Forget about Limewire, Napster, or Youtube to MP3 converters – you’ve got the best in the business by your side. And neither of you are going anywhere.
You may never love your college, but you chose her, and married her. It’s either going to end like a fairytale, or end like a slow-motion train wreck. You could either come out of this four year love affair with a degree, and the career of your dreams – or you could exit at any moment with thousands in debt, a criminal record, and possibly even a child – depending on how exactly you treat this one. You’ll complain all the while, but in the end you know, or hope – it will pay off. And if it doesn’t, well, it’ll end like most divorces – and that may just be good practice for later in life at this pace.
This one will light up, vibrate, and ring in the middle of the night, get you through your drunken stupor, and expose your abysmal social skills. You’ll defend her brand – like your own heritage, and simultaneously abuse the exterior, until she barely functions. Then, after you’ve rendered it useless – you’ll simply cash in your insurance, cut your losses, and get a new one. You’ll never live a day, or even moment without her.
You don’t need her. You don’t love her. She’s functional, organized, and has the ability to get a ton done. And costs a small fortune to fix. Can multi-task like a champion though, and will more resemble a relationship with a secretary, if you had one. But, you don’t – so that college education wouldn’t have been possible without her, and your introduction to the internet (AIM) wouldn’t have been possible without her in some form. For better or worse, you’re ultimately married to this one.
You look for her everywhere you go. You could be at a bar, at a restaurant, at a friend’s house, or complete stranger. Only one thing is for absolute certain. Everywhere you go, you are searching – constantly. And when you find it, you’ll connect and feel as safe and secure as you ever have in your life. Like a blanket from your youth, or like the safe feeling of being home – Wi-Fi very well could be the most committed relationship you’ll ever have.
Maybe you watch a few shows throughout the week. You know you could watch them online, and you probably do, but you just can’t bear to end it. Your home would look weird without it – and with an HDMI cable, a TV can really enhance your relationship with Netflix. So, the TV stays. At least they’ve gotten lighter, and easier to clean.