She’s the one who remains calm throughout an argument.
She forgives quickly, and accepts apologies with ease.
She gives and gives and gives without expecting much in return.
Her eyes don’t seem to lose their shine even after she’s been hurt.
Don’t think that what you do to hurt her is simply pushed out of the way. Don’t think that her calm demeanor in response to difficult situations means she’s avoiding it. Don’t think she’s naïve. Don’t think she’s ignorant.
People can continue to believe they are walking all over her, when really they are walking below her. She floats on clouds during a storm. She holds onto peace when war is all around her. She knows it’s the only way to really last without being damaged, without being swept by the strong winds you stir up against her.
She doesn’t forgive you quickly so that you’re able to hurt her again. Forgiveness doesn’t mean she forgets. She forgives you for herself. She forgives you because it relieves a pressure off of her that would remain if she held a grudge.
Don’t think she’ll allow the hurt to happen again.
She recognizes when responding with anger is just not worth it.
Kindness provides the feeling of intuition. It allows her to be more aware, more in tune with what’s going on around her. It is a luxury that anger does not provide. She uses this to her advantage.
She gives without expecting the same in return. The act of giving already provides enough satisfaction. No, you’re not taking advantage of her. She simply has recognized the feeling of expecting from others and it added no value to her life.
It seems as if she allows just about anyone in her life. She’s easy to persuade, to trick, to fool. Really, she believes everyone deserves a chance, to get to be known, to get to be heard, to get to be loved. This is how you learn. This is how you grow. She knows that allowing people of all kinds into her life, only expands her own.
She will always allow you to fight your case, even if she may not agree with it. She will listen. She will acknowledge when she is in the wrong and she will admit it if you’re right, even if you are unwilling to do the same.
She keeps her mind open, along with her heart.
Just because she’s nice, doesn’t mean she’s weak. Just because you yell at her while she remains calm, doesn’t mean she’s losing the fight.
If anything, she is winning.
While you’re wasting your energy and anger making your point, she’s listening carefully to your words and constructing a way to counter your criticism in the proper way. She puts up with bullshit and smiles, because she chooses to maintain a relationship over losing it to petty issues.
Remember that kindness is power. It cultivates respect from the right people and turns away the wrong ones. Being kind gives strength. It gives an ability to tolerate, to be patient, to love despite everything bad.
You may see it as a weakness, because it makes her seem soft, as if she can’t defend herself. Little do people know that kindness is an act of offense, not defense.
The situation becomes in her control when she can manage her anger or sadness or disgust and respond to others in a soft way. It gives her a control over the situation, instead of raging out to defend herself. People will always have their opinions about her. She has chosen to be judged as kind.
The hardest thing you realize about her is this- sometimes you’ll want to hate her, you’ll see her and feel angered or annoyed, but you just can’t express it.
She’s just too damn nice.