This Is How Our Flaws Help Us Grow

Valeria Boltneva
Valeria Boltneva

We all have those characteristics that seem undesirable, a dirty past we refuse to acknowledge. We make mistakes that we try desperately to cover up in order to portray ourselves as perfect, as if we’re a beautiful blooming flower picked away from the bug-infested ground.

Is that not how we were created though—as one big mistake? Isn’t it the big bang theory that insists we are all just made from an accidental commotion of atoms splitting open and then coming back together to eventually form our bodies?

The beautiful world we live on—full of fresh green, grassy fields and deep, flowing bodies of water did not just suddenly appear this way.

We are made from destruction.

The truth is right in our own body’s construct. We all make mistakes and in turn, they make us. We just refuse to acknowledge it.

We act as if imperfections will impair our ability to perform, to be loved or to get us to where we need to be.

This is a problem, because we are dismissing parts of ourselves when we ignore our flaws. We aren’t accepting the roots in which we grew from.

Without accepting our defeats and learning from them, how will we ever become what we aspire to be?

Opening up to the world completely and admitting that there are parts of us that are less than perfect is actually a brave act that not everyone is able to perform.

It is so easy to go on about our perfections like a long list of presents a child would write to Santa Claus on Christmas.

We can go on about how much money we have, our super fit bodies, a 4.0 GPA, or the amazing career we have. It’s admirable, but like the longing for materials a child develops around the holidays, it’s superficial and unrealistic.

How did we get to that point of success? We don’t get to scribble down our accomplishments and dreams, only to erase all that it takes to get there.

We are not simply a stream of popular posts on social media, edited and filtered in attempt to get the most likes. Forget your best self. It’s far more compelling when another person exposes their worst self. It’s more admirable when someone is able to admit their faults and still maintain a smile on their face.

Look at the way someone inhales a large hit of a cigarette, taking in the pain from years of struggle they’ve had to endure. Listen to a guy when he says he doesn’t trust women easily because he’s had his heart broken. Admire the stories of how someone gets out of a jail and is trying to make a difference in his or her life.

This is what makes another person’s life more interesting, more relatable.

So, tell the truth. Expose how you drank too much in your past. Go on about how inconsistent you are with your health. Tell others about your insecurities. Open up that pit of darkness you keep locked up within your heart.

It hurts to admit one’s own faults, but it’s also what makes us stronger.

If someone is unwilling to admit their flaws, they are hiding from their truth. They are showing their inability to grow.

I love all of my own mistakes and I fall in love with those who feel the same.

The mistakes I’ve made and flaws I carry are what have created anything good in my life. Through depression, I found true happiness. Through heartbreak, I was able to discover the meaning of love. Through failures, I created accomplishments. Through mistakes, I learned tough lessons.

If you are perfect, what is there to grow from? If you pretend your life is pristine, how will you ever manage to accept anything that goes wrong?

Were not made to live perfect lives. Chaos is bound to stir up in the midst of them, testing our strengths and abilities.

This is something we should celebrate, something we should be proud of. Wear your mistakes on you like a badge of honor for all to see. Expose the dirt and mess that lay beneath you and your beautiful accomplishments. You’ve fucked up and are still willing to live and deal with the consequences.

Because just like the soil flowers are planted on, flaws help us grow. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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