Musings On The Game

A few years ago, I bought a book. It’s black and leather-bound, has an embossed title, gold around the edges of its pages, and also comes with a red bookmark string that’s attached at one end to the spine.

Sound familiar?

No, it’s not the bible. But I don’t think it’s a purely coincidental fact that Neil Strauss’ The Game bears such a striking resemblance – as far as construction/design – to the holy writ. I remember it being paraded around as a sort of “Bible,” for guys on how to act at a club or a bar so that you could maximize your chances of hooking up. And I remember being so intrigued by this idea (there was a point in time where I couldn’t turn a corner without running into some poor shmuck rambling about this book) that I picked up a copy for myself.

Now, let me get one thing straight – this is not a book you read in plain sight in the student center at your university. That was the first thing that piqued my interest – it seemed to be a book that everyone (or every guy) was reading, but it wasn’t a book you would ever read in plain sight or put on your “favorite book” list on Facebook. It was like something that everyone had read but no one would admit to be reading. Of course, when I began perusing it for myself, I quickly realized why – it turned out to be one of the saddest reading experiences of my life.

A few years before Neil Strauss even published his “Bible,” I once knew of someone who embodied everything The Game would eventually come to be. He was a kid who went to our school – let’s call him Kyle. I had a friend who knew him personally but I only knew of him; at least, I knew several girls who eventually found themselves in his “clutches,” to use a clichéd term.

Let me get another thing straight – I hated Kyle. Not as a person, but I hated everything he stood for. At the same time, I was forced to almost admire just how absolutely slick he was at doing what he did: picking up girls. Kyle could get any girl he wanted. And I mean, literally, ANY girl he wanted. He was just that good. In fact, he once dated a friend of mine and broke up with her. She ranted about him for months, telling me about how she realized what a sleazebag he was. This friend of mine was a good girl. She really was. And I guess that was when I first learned to resent Kyle – kind of on behalf of this girl. Imagine my surprise, then, when I found out yet a few months later that he had managed to convince her to give him another chance and they started going out again! And this would happen with another friend of mine. And countless others.

Like I said, Kyle was just that good. He was SO good, in fact, that he managed to make guys like him, too. I talked to someone about this once – about how sometimes, a sleazy guy could push the right buttons with a girl, but other GUYS – genuinely nice guys – would always recognize just how much of a creep he was. Not so with Kyle. He was the kind of guy who could steal your girlfriend and then make you feel like he was doing you a favour.

In a lot of ways, to fall victim to Kyle’s charms was proof that you were human and operated within the norms of society. He recognized that deep down, we all have certain buttons that could be pushed, and he was so good at exploiting this that you’d find Kyle telling you exactly what you wanted to hear.
When I read The Game a few years later, it basically felt like I was reading about Kyle. I didn’t fully realize this at first, but that’s what The Game is: a guide to how women behave and how you can use this to your advantage.

As I read The Game (I confess, I didn’t finish it and I still haven’t but I got through a good 85-90%), I realized two things. The first thing was unsettling. The second was ugly. The first thing I realized was that Neil Strauss was right. Kyle was living proof of this. He illuminated a lot of truths about how we interact socially and why certain gestures, words, and behaviours were always bound to elicit the same responses (good and bad). I remember reading about being the “Alpha Male of the Group” and how you need to make yourself look better than every other male in the immediate vicinity and that putting them down was fair game. I remember reading about how teasing (a.k.a. “negging”) was important because if you complimented a girl, you’ve put her in the “driver’s seat.” I remember reading about all sorts of things that someone like Kyle seemed, innately, to understand. And I remember feeling bothered by the fact that this was how society operated… that traditional symbols of good character like dependability, compassion, chivalry, and kindness had become warped, contorted, and branded as “boring”; and in their place, “negging,” slickness, flash, and style rose to prominence as being cool, sexy, and exciting.

When I put it this way, it all sounds quite over the top and some of you might be saying “That’s not how our society works!” But actually, if you look at the fundamental “rules” of social interaction, I think you’ll find that it’s more true than you realize. They find their way into almost everything we do, even if it’s only on a micro-scale. I remember talking to some friends years ago when MSN was still in vogue and someone mentioned how you shouldn’t message someone as soon as they come online because it makes you look like you were sitting there waiting for them to sign on just so you could talk to them. And even if that wasn’t the case, you waited 5 minutes anyway just to “show” that you were “doing something else and only just realized that they had signed on.” I also remember thinking, “What’s wrong with messaging someone as soon as they sign on, even if it DOES make you seem eager to talk to them? Maybe I AM eager to talk to them.” But no no no, you can’t do that… you don’t want to make it seem like you wanted to talk to them, god forbid. You had to make it seem like talking to them was just no skin off your back. You had to play it cool; like they were no big deal… even if you would have cried yourself to sleep that night if they didn’t respond.

So that’s the first thing. And yeah, it’s a little unsettling. But you know what really got under my skin? This second thing. I was horrified to find out that instead of reading The Game and saying, “Wow, we are a bunch of messed up and disgusting creatures,” guys were saying, “Wow, now I know how I should act around women!” Instead of being a social commentary that could be used as a jumping off point for rectifying these flaws in our society, guys were actually buying into Neil Strauss’ philosophy! I remember some of my friends – kind, solid guys with good hearts – reading The Game and thinking that the book was a signal to them that they had to change; that they had to start ignoring women and become the Alpha Male of their Groups; that they had to start treating women like they (women) weren’t important because that’s how you could be “successful” at “the game.”

WHAT?!

No! That’s wrong! Completely and utterly backwards! And I’ll tell you why. I mean, we know the most obvious reasons why this is wrong: it objectifies women. The Game is one of the most patriarchal, misogynistic pieces of literature I have ever read because not only does it reduce women to “prizes,” it actually ventures to assert that that is what women want.

But I’ll tell you the other, more latent, reason behind why The Game is terrible. Guys who learn the rules of The Game rarely ever end up being happy. And this is something that many guys don’t realize when they buy into its philosophy. The Game only promises you sex; it says nothing about love, happiness, or fulfillment. It would be bad enough if only guys who wanted sex read The Game. However, a good number of guys who read The Game and hail it as their Bible… are, deep-down, simply lonely and tired of being single. And the most ironic thing is that in order to play “the game,” you MUST be single; everything taught by The Game revolves around staying single so you can practice and perfect your “craft” – being a really good pick-up artist. It’s not about finding a girlfriend and yet, the guys reading it do so because they want to fall in love.

In the end, I wouldn’t be too quick to place blame on any particular party. As I’ve said, the fact that The Game works is more proof that we’re human than anything else. I would never go so far as to say that girls shouldn’t let themselves get caught up with guys who practice The Game but I would like to say something to the guys. In the end, The Game is just that: a game. The words you say don’t mean anything; the connections you make, artificial. If you want something better than that, you have to BE better than that. TC mark

image – The Game

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  • http://twitter.com/galette_rois Julian Galette

    You really should finish the game – the book basically ends with Neil realizing how hollow the lifestyle is and how fucked up Mystery and most of the other dudes in the PUA community are. He never makes the precise social commentary about human interaction, but it’s pretty implicit. 

    Then Neil Strauss has gone one to make thousands of dollars holding PUA conferences and such so who knows how that dude really feels. 

    Either way, the book left a bad taste in my mouth.

    But I’m still not getting laid so what the fuck do I know. 

  • realist

    I don’t think The Game is such a big bad evil thing. It’s just a book. To put the theory into practice requires significant practice and work, and despite the promised outcome, like most things, people (guys) will give up pretty soon after they’ve started. We don’t have a society of super slick pick up artists in every social environment, taking advantage of all the poor girls – give them some more credit by the way – you paint females as these helpless, defenseless creatures to be taken advantage of by the super smart, well equipped male. I think this indirect brand of misogyny is far more damaging.

  • realist

    I don’t think The Game is such a big bad evil thing. It’s just a book. To put the theory into practice requires significant practice and work, and despite the promised outcome, like most things, people (guys) will give up pretty soon after they’ve started. We don’t have a society of super slick pick up artists in every social environment, taking advantage of all the poor girls – give them some more credit by the way – you paint females as these helpless, defenseless creatures to be taken advantage of by the super smart, well equipped male. I think this indirect brand of misogyny is far more damaging.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Steven-Timberman/922794 Steven Timberman

    Read The Game a few months back and I really find it a fascinating and flawed work – but not for the reasons you outline. The Game IS about finding Your One True Woman (Sweater’s quest in the book stands in for most of this), but only by dating around can you really gain the true worth of a woman. Sure, that sounds mysogynistic. 

    But can any man really talk about wanting to pull without sounding like an asshole? 

    I found it hilarious that whenever I told a girl that I was reading and applying the rules of The Game she had the same response “Oh my god, that’s horrible! You can’t treat women that way! Tell me more!” 

    I used some of the techniques Neil recommended and lo and behold, I started pulling. But at some point I realized I wasn’t pulling as angsty artist Steve, but as some weird placeholder for Neil Strauss and this generic-become-a-man package. 

    And ultimately this is why I defend Neil and The Game. I went out pulling with my own version of Kyle (you know, that one friend who just naturally has those weapons in his arsenal) and I noticed that he did everything the book was telling me to do. He didn’t read the book, he just DOES these things around women. At one point he grabbed a girl, leaned in for a photo, his hand around the small of her back. I went up a few minutes and said “I see what you did there, some kino, you know, physical contact.” He looked at me blankly.

    Some men need an instruction manual. And so yes, Neil taught me how to approach a woman, how to kiss her, but not how to love her. Read it, digest it, but adapt it for your own purposes. Its only mysogynistic trash if you start applying it as such.  

  • Holly

    back when I was younger (ok, like a year or two ago), I was totally into boys who ran the game and displayed “alpha male” behavior. now I know that the most important thing is to be yourself, respect yourself and know what qualities are important to you in the opposite sex. because in the end, isn’t it about being with someone you connect with and enjoy being around? (it takes a lot of energy to keep up a facade)

    anyway, thanks for writing this. when I first opened this piece, I was expecting a long, drawn-out unoriginal dissection about the ways boys + girls relate to each other… I was pleasantly surprised. :)

    • Holly

      anyway, I believe that as long as you’re happy with yourself and your life, you shouldn’t have any problems attracting people– regardless of age or looks, or if you’re a nice guy”, smartass, awkward or otherwise.

      • http://www.facebook.com/gregpphoto Greg Petliski

        Hahahahahaha. Ok.

      • Holly

        someone is better with low self-esteem (like most of the TC readership).

      • Holly

        BITTER. not better, ew (talk about big red flag).

    • http://www.facebook.com/gregpphoto Greg Petliski

      You’d still be into them if one of em came up to you at a bar.

    • http://www.facebook.com/gregpphoto Greg Petliski

      You’d still be into them if one of em came up to you at a bar.

      • Holly

        I’d see right through it. there are many ways to test for “congruence”– aka how he feels about his life, himself. it comes out eventually. :)

  • Sippycup

    If all you want to do is fuck (which rightly or wrongly is a goal for some people) The Game will probably help you.

    If you want a healthy relationship The Game is about as useful as Mein Kampf is for world peace.

    • http://www.facebook.com/gregpphoto Greg Petliski

      Mein Kampf indirectly lead to the formation of the United Nations.

      • Sippycup

        And 9/11 lead to a pedestrian plaza being built in downtown Manhattan.

      • http://www.facebook.com/gregpphoto Greg Petliski

        I think theres some validity in both our statements. Consider the fact that it took a very evil man to bring together what would become the world’s two superpowers for the second half of the 20th century. Many historians have stated that only Hitler could have brought the United States and the USSR together as Allies, and once he was dead, so was their alliance. So in a paradoxical way hatred can bring about peace.

      • heehee

        no shut the fuck up you shit head

  • Ceqli

    Interestingly enough, it was when I stopped trying to do the PUA spiel that I really began to attract girls. Why? I stopped trying to impress them, and I started trying to form connections with them. Finding common ground, like favorite places to travel or similar artistic interests. I presented myself as I am – not masculine, not alpha; just skinny, sassy, me.

    Another problem arose from this, but it’s a good problem: YOU now get to choose who you sleep with and spend your time with. A lot of people – girls AND guys, if you’re Bi ;) – will come knocking on your door, and you owe it to yourself to choose someone who’s both smart, emotionally healthy, and attractive. Don’t settle for less, and DON’T pick someone based on their looks. Some of the most beautiful women I ever slept with were dumb as rocks, and quite content about it.

    To wrap this up: Jon Wong is absolutely right. We’ve been conditioned as a society to revere and chase after sex.  After casual sex. And that kind of lifestyle isn’t something ANYONE should aspire to. The most fulfilling sex comes from long-term relationships – both on a physical and emotional level. So if you’re out there and you’re looking for love, DON’T look to this book.

    (By the way, most females who fall for the PUA spiel aren’t interested in a relationship anyway)

    • http://www.facebook.com/gregpphoto Greg Petliski

      Easy for you to say, but when you’re into mountains and fossils and shit like that, there aint much common ground to be formed with girls. Girls don’t do cool shit, a very rare few do, but most, their ambition in life is to look hot. Its pretty much impossible for me to speak to women because of this. I can’t go up to one and say “hey see this necklace? Its 70 million years old, late cretaceous goblin sharks tooth!”

      • Howstrangetobeanythingatall

        Girls don’t dislike you because you’re a nerd, girls dislike you because you’re sexist. “Girls don’t do cool shit…?” “…but most, their ambition in life is to look hot…?” Are you fucking kidding me? No wonder you have trouble with girls.

      • http://www.facebook.com/gregpphoto Greg Petliski

        Name me some female mountain climbers. Or paragliders. Or lumberjacks. Sure, there are some, no doubt, but not many. I’m just going by what I observe. Take one of my passions, skateboarding. I don’t see many girls skateboarding, and even fewer who are actually committed to it beyond looking cool and trying to attract guys. Thats the problem with girls, even when you do cool shit, its probably cuz your last boyfriend got you into it. How many girls are into sports, and how many girls are into sports because theyre boyfriends are yankee fans or what have you? Its all bullshit.

      • Guest

        wOw skAtEboarDing!  THAT IS SO KEWL!!!!!!!!!!!111 put your dick in my mouth plz

      • http://www.facebook.com/gregpphoto Greg Petliski

        At this point, only if you were a dude.

      • http://www.facebook.com/gregpphoto Greg Petliski

        At this point, only if you were a dude.

      • Guest

        GREGGY you are sooooo smart and you have all these interesting smart interests like mountains!  and lumberj… lumberjaccing?  please let’s make love

      • A.

        Holy shit, you’re a douche. That’s the most sexist thing I’ve ever read.

      • Loljame

        seriously? seriously? the fact that you’ve never met a girl who’s had interests other than looking hot tells me way more about you than the girls you never want to date. stop being so close-minded man. live a little outside of your comfort zone.

      • heehee

        oh, oops, sorry we have survival instincts and (as an extremely broad generality) don’t like climbing up mountain tops or plummeting off of said mountain tops — and just to be clear, i say that as an avid rock climber, so fuck the fuck off. also sorry we have a different pack mentality and we don’t cream our pants every time Lester throws a no hitter — and i say that as an attendee of last nights red sox game.
        kill yourself

      • Sippycup

        >I can’t go up to one and say “hey whatya think of this necklace? Its 70 million years old, late cretaceous goblin sharks tooth!”

        Clearly you don’t live in Brooklyn or know any women who shop on Etsy.

      • http://www.facebook.com/gregpphoto Greg Petliski

        Haha, well I’m talking about going out, getting your hands dirty and unearthing the fossils!

      • Guest

        I hope you die today.

  • Adolf Hipster

    Nice article but some of the points you raise can be answered by thes book’s ending where Neil pretty much admits that the game definitely doesn’t have anything to do with ‘real love’.

  • http://www.facebook.com/gregpphoto Greg Petliski

    That book lays out on paper what evolution has ingrained in us. And yeah, I hate it too.

    • http://twitter.com/galette_rois Julian Galette

      To be real, most of the actual PUA concepts are presented in the text pretty vaguely if at all…both Mystery and Strauss still want people to have a reason to buy their own PUA materials. As an actual PUA text, The Game is rather incomplete. 

      • http://www.facebook.com/gregpphoto Greg Petliski

        Of course, its a business strategy same as everyone else uses. But the book does discuss ideas and concepts that are directly tied into evolution and sexual selection. Thats all going out is, sexual selection. Males put on some sort of display, and women choose (usually very cautiously, until they’re drunk). All the “mind games” men have to employ are simply because evolution has made mammalian females extremely picky, to ensure whoever she reproduces with is worth it. Problem is they have that same mentality when it comes to casual sex. If the sex is so casual, why be so picky about it? Why do I have to perform a sequence of events juuuuuust right to get the “privilege” of sleeping with you?

      • Anonymous

        lol

      • xra

        cause her limbic brain thinks yr about to impregnate the shit out of her w/out making any commitments, so you better be way worth it

      • http://www.facebook.com/gregpphoto Greg Petliski

        Thats what condoms are for.

  • ELNE

    this book is probably more successful with this generation because we’re so use to looking shit up on the internet trying to have things explained to us rather than just go out there do social trial and error.

  • Mr Shankly

    Well shit. I just lost the game.

  • Maxtheman45

    Read the rest of the book bro, Neil Strauss talks about the same stuff in his final chapters.

  • Guest

    The Game makes me want to puke and cry until my body ceases to function and I die.  

  • xra

    all these guys in the comments trying their hardest to parrot the “game can get you in a girl’s pants but it can’t help you love her/be in a good relationship” line are either white-knighting goobers or don’t understand the concepts they’re applying. a woman will keep fitness testing you from the first approach to the last argument when yr both 89, you can never expect it to stop. if you pass the tests you are rewarded with sex and love, but failing chips  away at her esteem for you. The trick that “game” literature stumbled on is that you don’t display value by jumping through her hoops just right, you do it by demonstrating that you can disregard her hoops entirely. This, along with the non-needy/clingy mentality that a knowledge of female psychology inculcates, can dramatically enhance the experience of romance for both partners, and keep it stronger longer

    then again i haven’t read “The Game” itself, so who knows the book might just suck. i mean that whole hollywood peacocking PUA scene is pretty ridiculous after all

    • Guest

      Isn’t it just, like, good for everyone to not be needy/clingy?  Why does presenting that concept have to be so misogynistic/creeptastic?

      • xra

        sure, but that’s a what not a how

        as for the second q i have no interest in defending a book i haven’t read, but the science of attraction and relationships is itself a neutral ground, regardless of whatever tone those trying to make money off it might use to pitch their little how-to manuals

  • http://www.nosexcity.com NoSexCity

    I’ve read the whole book a few times, and I can see what you’re saying. I can also see where I picked up little bits about interaction that have been useful to me both professionally and personally.

    As for this: “The Game only promises you sex; it says nothing about love, happiness, or fulfillment.” — you should have read the ending, like Julian said down there somewhere. Neil winds up sad, and Mystery definitely winds up completely screwed up in the head. That last bit you missed was probably the same portion of the book that most men either a) never made it to or, b) forgot they read. 

  • Courtney

    Thank you so much for putting this out there. As a woman who was curious about this concept, I read The Game so that I could learn how to avoid men who followed its rules. It was actually terribly sad and by the end of it I was devastated that some nice guys out there might actually think these were the guidelines to finding happiness with a good woman (like you said). So thank you for spreading this message. 

  • Maxwell Smart

    I LOVE when guys come up to me in the bar and start trying to pull this shit. I smile, laugh at their attempt to catch me off guard, and then say “Oh, how cute, you’re trying to NEG me!” Then their jaws hit the floor because I know their secrets and they start backing off. If they’re still close enough, they end up covered in whiskey sour.

  • http://sans.deadti.me/ Amy McDeath

    The world will be a much better place when men stop searching for meaning at the bottom of vaginas.

    • Tony Jiang

      top*

  • Rebuttal

    In defense of The Game.

    First off, I’m not at all a PUA. I read The Game about a year ago and was pretty impressed by it. However, rather than trying to run “missions” and all that, I took away the concept that Neil Strauss really pushes – which is some genuine self confidence, and it changed my life for the better. Ironically, I also got sidetracked and hurt by trying to be someone other than myself. At the end of it though, I walked away from The Game knowing much more about social cues, interactions, and presentation, and my life is better off as a result. I’ll elaborate. 

    First, I want to stress see The Game as a concept, not a set of techniques. It’s a way of thinking that clearly gets at some fundamental ways our society works. However, as a wide-encompassing concept, the techniques often get skewed into the extreme. The first and main criticism The Game gets is that it’s a misogynistic manifesto. This is the result of the many guys out there, (like Kyle, although he may have just been a natural-born douche,) who learn The Game, get good at it, and use it to screw over one girl after another. That is a decision they make, however, and thus a reflection on their characters and not the concept. It’s really important that you understand this bit before we move on. Concept =/= applications. The Secret is a concept (albeit, a very controversial one,) and tons of greats throughout history talk about how our thinking shapes our world. I, personally, tend to think that’s true. However, sitting there and visualizing happiness without moving a toe to get it will clearly get you nowhere. That’s an extreme application of The Secret. Keeping a positive attitude while you strive for something, on the other hand, will probably do you well. Religion is a concept. If it makes you a better person to follow a God, all the better. Suicide bombings are an extreme application of that concept. Are you catching on? This is a crucial point: it is very easy to mistake techniques/applications for the concept. Douchebags who play girls and toss them aside do so because they choose to. The Game just gives them the tools, but they determine how to use them. Instead of settling down with a girl they’d consider “out-of-their-league” before, they want to continue getting laid, because that’s what’s important to them. It’s not because The Game messed them up, it’s because that’s how their priorities are. These guys are, perhaps, making up for years of loneliness and don’t really care that they’re hurting women in the meanwhile. They, and not the message of The Game, are unfortunate misogynists. 

    The concept of The Game is simple: guys fail because they make the girl The Prize. Instead, they should focus on unleashing some *genuine* self-confidence. In order to be attractive, guys need to assert themselves and be able to present their best selves instead of desperately trying to please the girl in hopes of winning her affections. 

    Stop. Read that short paragraph over again. Really. 

    That is my personal interpretation of The Game. Notice that it says nothing about HOW to do it. There are a multitude of ways, and I’ll elaborate briefly in a bit. However, by this point, it is absolutely essential that you understand the difference between the Message and the Followers. 

    So, if you’ve followed thus far, here’s where we go next. The Game spends a lot of time describing how guys run lines on girls and covers a lot of TECHNIQUES without necessarily advocating them. The book grasps at some basic truths: WE (and not just women!) want what we can’t have, confidence is attractive, first impressions are a BIG deal, etc. The big point is that there are a lot of nice guys out there who have no idea how to approach beautiful women, because they are intimidated as hell, and the real way to meet women is to find some self confidence and know how to demonstrate value. Whether you’re a nice guy or an asshole depends entirely on you. Concept says: women don’t like guys who constantly chase after them, so have something else to focus on and don’t throw yourself at her feet in hopes of impressing her. That’s not how social cues/evolutionary biology works. Particular technique (neg) says: subtly insult the woman to get her attention. Do you have to do that to show you’re attractive? Hell no. There are plenty of other ways to show your best self, and I personally don’t think negs are any good at all. Yes, they may work on some women, but they are plain mean, as are many other techniques PUAs use. Anyway, I’m gonna wrap up in a few instead of rambling on, because I’m sure a few of you will have plenty of objections to what I’ve said. 

    ON MISOGYNY, CHIVALRY, AND TO THE WOMEN OFFENDED BY THE GAME: 

    If you still haven’t caught on, it’s not the tools that matter, it’s the guys who use them. You can use The Game to approach a woman you consider “out-of-your-league,” present your best self, and if she likes you, you can start a relationship and treat her as well as she deserves. Guys who use The Game to hurt one woman after the other do so because their own priorities are messed up. SO, GIRLS, if a guy approaches you with a line, or you see The Game on his shelf one day, don’t jump to the popular conclusion. He might be a genuinely good guy, but he’s intimidated as hell by your looks/popularity and the fact that you seem to keep wanting to hang out with natural douchebags like Kyle (who are naturally messed up having never read the game.)

    Briefly: I read The Game after getting really hurt over a breakup, and I used it to be able to approach girls I’d never talk to before. What I was really going through was a string of post-breakup hookups, and that’d be happening regardless, only now I was hooking up with much more attractive girls. In the midst of being all hurt and shut in, I met a girl who was great, but I was too focused on building myself up to stay with her, and I ended up getting hurt again. For a while, I blamed The Game for messing up my priorities, until I realized that I was the problem, not the book. Now, I’ve taken the genuine confidence I’ve discovered from learning about pick-up and I use it to present my best self to girls I’d never have the balls to talk to before. But I’ve learned my lesson and I’m not rushing anywhere, and if a relationship comes along, all the better. I used to be a “nice guy” pushover who kept chasing after girls that always went with the asshole. Now I’m a “nice guy” with confidence, and I’m a lot happier as a result. 

    I guess this is the point where you rip me apart.

  • http://twitter.com/devilishdelish Miss Delish

    As a woman who has read The Game multiple times, along with every other Neil Strauss book (and who also has gotten a chance to speak with Neil personally on multiple occasions), I could not disagree with you more.
    Sure, if you take the book and take it as a manual, it is going to fail you.  It will turn you into a pathetic mess.  But that happens with anything.  And if you had bothered to finish the book, you would see that Neil talks about it quite a bit in the end – about how obsessing over THE GAME and landing the women without actually taking the time to better themselves on the inside fell apart.  It ruined them.

    It is all about guys gaining the confidence to go after what they want and deserve.  It is about men bettering themselves.  It is about men realizing that they don’t have to settle.  Neil repeats so often in his books that if you don’t better yourself and have confidence, you have nothing.  THAT is the basis of the game.

    The Game is giving afraid and shy men everywhere some insight into women and how we work, and giving them the tools to go after what they want.  How in the world is that a bad thing?

    BTW, go on Neil’s Inner Circle website and read some of his posts, particularly The Hot Girl Relief Fund.  Then come back and tell me you honestly think so poorly about what he has to say. 

  • Margaret Thatcher

    I plan on reading this book soon. I believe in knowing my enemies.

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