21 Andy Dwyer-isms That Will Help You Live Your Best Life

Parks and Recreation
Parks and Recreation

1. “When life gives you lemons make lemonade. I read that one on a can of lemonade. I like to think it applies to life.”

2. “When I get bummed out, I take my shirt off because the bad feelings make me feel sweaty.”

3. “I have no idea what I’m doing, but I know I’m doing it really, really well.”

4. “Coffee is my favorite non-alcoholic hot drink, except for hot tea. And hot orange juice. Weirdly delicious.”

5. “I promise I will not spit in anyone’s food, unless they should request that I do.”

Parks and Recreation
Parks and Recreation

6. “My whole life is a giant mess, and I love it!”

7. “They never tell you when you go solo that it’s just gonna be you up there.”

8. “Shotgun! I call shotgun. Where are we going? Doesn’t matter. Shotgun. Shotgun on all rides for the rest of the day. For the rest of my life. In any car! Haha!”

9. “I know what things are.”

10. “Anything is a toy if you play with it.”

11. “Just remember every time you look up at the moon, I too will be looking at a moon. Not the same moon, obviously, that’s impossible.”

12. “This case just remained interesting.”

Parks and Recreation
Parks and Recreation

13. “I’m allergic to sushi. Every time I eat more than 80 pieces, I throw up.”

14. “I want to treat April like a queen. And queens deserve flowers and massages, chocolate, booze, diamonds, rubies, emeralds, them treasure chests full of scarves, different kinds of lubes that warm up when you rub them on stuff.”

15. “Do I have to tuck my shirt in? Because, honestly, that’s kind of a dealbreaker.”

16. “I’d say my coaching style is centered around fundamentals, with an emphasis on fun. And a second emphasis on… mental.”

17. “There’s an old saying in show business: The show must go wrong. Everything always goes wrong, and you just have to deal with it.”

18. “By day. Andy Dwyer, shoeshinist. By different time of day, Andy Radical, possum tackler. And by night? Do whatever I want, no job.”

Parks and Recreation
Parks and Recreation

19. “Butter is my favorite food.”

20. “I’m not crying, okay? I’m just allergic to jerks!”

21. Andy: “You know when you go to the ATM and get money—is there an actual guy that stands there and gives you money?”
Ron: “No.”
Andy: “Yeah, those are robots.” TC mark

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