1. You often exclaim, “Ugh, my life is a sitcom!” after anything slightly funny happens in your life, because you hope that if you say it enough, it’ll Beetlejuice itself into existence.
2. You’re constantly categorizing everyone you know into sitcom characters. Those two are a total Sam and Diane couple. Get ready for a roller coaster of a relationship, am I right?
3. You have particular coffee shops and bars that you have to go to all the time, because in your mind, those locations are the main sets of your personal sitcom.
4. Similarly, you have specific booths that you make sure to sit at whenever possible, because that’s just how life should be, okay??
5. You laugh uproariously in your head at all of your jokes, because it’s as close as you’ll get to your own personal laugh track.
6. You’re an expert on all the new sitcoms every year, because you need to make sure you find the next big show as soon as possible.
7. As a result, you’re also extremely good at predicting which shows will survive a full season and get renewed for a second.
8. Half of your jokes are repurposed bits from old sitcoms. It’s win-win for you, because either people don’t recognize the joke and think you’re HILARIOUS or they do, and you’ve found a fellow sitcom-lover.
9. You’re immediately turned off by people that say they “just aren’t fans of sitcoms.” You enjoy an intense drama just as much as the next person, but to dislike sitcoms? What? Do you just hate laughter? Happiness?
10. You sometimes have to force yourself back into reality, because your love of sitcoms often leaves you extremely optimistic and a little out of touch with how normal humans behave.
11. You’re incredibly pun-tastic, and that’s just the way you like it.
12. Your apartment is sprinkled with tiny references to all your favorite shows. Empty frame hanging on your front door? Check. Little red phone booth on your mantle? Double check.
13. You’ve spent just as much time watching your favorite shows as you’ve spent watching their bloopers, because they make the characters seem that much more human, and like, you could totally be friends with Jason Segel in real life. You’ve got identical senses of humor!
14. You’ve thought long and hard about which song you would want as the theme song for your imaginary show.
15. Whenever you have two friends that are going through an on-again-off-again relationship, the idealistic sitcom-lover in you insists that they MUST end up together! They have to!
16. The gentle murmur of a sitcom is the closest thing you’ll ever have to a lullaby.