1. Any future plans always include them.
Camping trips, apartment hunting, retirement homes. It doesn’t matter if you’re not living with each other, you’re always figuring out how far away you’ll be and how often you’ll try and see each other.
2. Whenever you decide to hate everything and become a recluse for a weekend, they’re leading the search to find you.
Your text messaging feed often looks something like this:
-Hey wanna grab dinner?
-I guess that’s a no?
-Are you dead?
-BITCH, ANSWER YOUR PHONE.
-I’m calling you.
-Ok, I’m calling your parents.
-Pick up your phone, or I’m calling the police.
-Fuck it, I’m coming over.
3. They’ll be a recluse with you.
They show up at your place, and just sit and watch Scrubs all day until they can convince you to maybe take a shower. But at your pace. They know you just need some time, and that you would do the exact same thing if the roles were reversed (which they often have).
4. You’re comfortable even when you have nothing to talk about.
It’s the silences that make or break a relationship. When you see each other all the time, and know everything about one another, there are often a lot of times when you’ve simply run out of things to talk about. So you just keep each other company like an old married couple, whose entire breakfast conversation consists of “Do you want any orange juice?” “No.”
5. When something significant happens, they’re the first person you want to talk to.
“Significant” can vary in scope from you getting that promotion you’ve been hoping for to it was 2 for 1 day at Trader Joes, so you got two bottles of wine. Either way, they’re always the first person you want to tell.
6. They’re your non-related emergency contact.
Your parents live far away, and you know your best friend is the only person you 100% trust to drop everything and come to your aid if something were to happen.
7. They’ll go to the mattresses for you no matter what.
We hate him now? Okay yeah. No problem. Chipotle ripped you off? We’re never eating there again, and I’m writing a scathing Yelp review! Nobody puts baby in a corner!
8. They’ll call you out when you’re being irrational.
Just as quickly as they’ll go to war for you, they’re going to ask why, and if your reasoning is completely ridiculous, they’re going to drop something along the lines of, “I love you, and we can hate them, but you’re acting crazy and need a time out for a bit.”
9. Your energy level drops significantly when you haven’t seen them recently.
The two of you are like a phone and its charger to each other. If one of you is away from the other for too long, you just start to feel drained, and nothing will make you feel better than a nice, long charge.
10. You have so many inside jokes, it almost doubles as a second language.
People have just come to understand that when they’re hanging out with the two of you, they’re the third wheel, and it’s not worth trying to have the joke explained to them.
11. They’ve seen you at your worst, but somehow still want to be around you.
You’re pretty amazed by that, considering how horrible you can be at times, but they’re always there for you and you’re always there for them. Neither of you can really explain why, it just feels natural to forgive all the shit you’ve put each other through.
12. It’s just as stressful to introduce any romantic interests to your friend, as it is to your parents.
It can be more stressful actually, because this new person will presumably take their place as roommate or confidante or whatever, and they want to make sure the new person is really fucking worth it.
13. They’ve seen you through relationship problems and let you tell the same story (good or bad) over and over again.
And you’ve seriously told that story to them a million times. But every time, they’ll make the appropriate remarks, “You don’t say”ing their way through the whole thing, because they know you need to vent about it just one more time.
14. Even when you get into really bad fights, making up is relatively easy.
Neither of you like the idea of fighting with each other, and both end up biting at the bit to finally get over the fight and be best friends again.
15. They’re like a cat, you fed them once, and now they refuse to leave.
And you’re pretty okay with that.