Online dating has gone too far. It’s time we gave our swiping fingers a rest. I enjoyed the rise and rise of Tinder as much as anyone, but by using these dating apps, we are denying ourselves the most glorious part of the courtship process.
Those beautifully awkward initial moments. The butterflies as you toy with the best thing to say. Jumping off the ‘Hi’ dive. Watching her confusion turn to skepticism, interest and finally attraction as you natter away. It’s like watching a flower blossom. Unfortunately, these gorgeous courtships are increasingly being replaced with tales of right swipes and Facebook likes — and it looks like it’s only going to get worse.
The success of Tinder has led to the development of several copycat apps. Some let you scope out profiles of people in the same room. Happn, for example, uses GPS technology to alert you when a fellow member strolls past. You can learn their name, hobbies and send a flirty message without having to even glance across the bar at them. (How romantic.) What if this becomes the new norm, just as Tinder-dates have? How far will these easy-access apps go? Will chatting up someone cute become a thing of the past?
Some may hope it does. After all, the fear of rejection is something we’d all rather not have to deal with. Hitting on women is a terrifying process for the shy-guys, while even the biggest alpha-males have egos to protect. This fear is eliminated in online dating, which is a huge part of what makes it popular. It appeals to our inherently lazy natures as well. Why muster up the courage to approach a gorgeous girl when we could easily swipe another hundred just like her?
The ability to set up dozens of dates while still in your sweatpants may appeal, but I’d urge you to stick with the traditional method. For me, being able to charm a gorgeous girl to her face is part of being a real man. If my granddad’s generation were too shy to woo a fair lady, they’d die alone without passing on their genes.
Approaching girls doesn’t have to be a terrifying experience either. These four steps are all you need to enjoy every interaction with the opposite sex.
1. Learn to love yourself so much that their opinion of you becomes unimportant.
2. Approach everyone with the aim of adding fun and banter.
3. Learn to enjoy the process itself, rather than looking for an end result.
4. Escalate once you spot signs of attraction.
Master these steps and you’ll master the scary world of ‘real-life’ dating.
Sure, there’s plenty of fish in the online sea, and it’s less effort to catch them with the ‘net, but this sexy game of cat and mouse is much more of an adventure.
Let’s grow some balls and go back to creating truly magical romances.