This is the first thing you need to know about decision-making: you don’t need more information to decide.
A lot has been said about how to be super confident, about how to be decisive in stressful situations and when you are put on the spot, but let’s be honest…all those self-help books often lead nowhere, they don’t provide any real tools that you can use to change your life in a massive way.
You will probably do nothing after you read/ listen/ watch all the motivational talk. You will stay in the same place.
For years I tried to find the secret solution to feel powerful all the time and that led me to an amazing breakthrough. It took me a long time to understand this: If you want to feel strong, powerful and in “god mode” then you are doing nothing else but running away from fear and insecurity.
One can say that the faster you run towards being confident, the closer you are to be caught by insecurity. This is the true meaning of a vicious circle.
So what can you do?
I am sure that you put a lot of effort in your decision-making process. You evaluate every position, every outcome, you try to minimize the damage and increase the benefits. But this is all useless. Sure, it gives you a sense of security but that’s it.
If you think clearly, you will see that the number of possible outcomes is infinite and you can’t see all the variables. I know, you are just fooling yourself.
The more time you spend comparing every single path the less decisive you are. Just think about what we mean by the word “decisive”: someone who doesn’t hesitate. Therefore someone who simply acts and doesn’t think about the best path to go, he just goes!
So the next time you are faced with a decision, be decisive. Follow the choice that is closest to your heart and don’t look back. That is what being confident means.
Your purpose, most often than not, comes in those moments where you act spontaneously and you flow in the moment. (Ever do something spontaneous and then feeling that wasn’t aligned to your perceived self-image? Of course! That is because your perceived self-image is blurred, while your actions aren’t.)
To be confident also implies that you accept your insecurities. After all that is what makes us humans, that is what makes us interesting and brings us closer. Accepting your insecurities will give you an unparalleled advantage. Most people are too afraid, are too uptight, feel that they have too much to lose and so they try to hide their insecurities as much as possible.
This is why “cool” people are actually boring people and lack depth. They might seem very confident, but actually they are the most insecure kind of people that there is. They feel that at any moment they might lose their status and so are as fake as possible. Always vigilant, never letting their guard down.
When you accept your insecurities then you are confident; if you are confident you can allow yourself to be decisive and act in the moment.
I understand that you might be afraid of making mistakes, but many of the mistakes that you made happened by simple fumbling, by doubting on the lack of knowledge of not knowing which is the correct path, by thinking so much about the right way that you end up having no idea which is the right way.
So relax. Nothing bad will happen and you can trust yourself. After all nothing really really bad will happen by that decisiveness. Nothing is as permanent as it seems.