I’m Almost Always A Bro (And I’m Totally Fine With It)

Ariel H.
Ariel H.

For ages, girls have been friend-zoning guys. You know, where a guy likes them, but they want to be “just friends” because “they’re a really nice person and you like hanging out with them,” only to then be cast aside by said guy, because said guy wasn’t “getting any.”

It’s the classic story of boy-meets-girl-and-gets-friendzoned-and-leaves-girl. It’s rare that you find some good guys to stick by your side, through thick and thin, to be your go-tos, your true homies. The guys you can go to for guy advice, the ones who you can watch sports with or drag to the mall sans complaint, the ones who pester you to no end because you’re basically their little sister. Those guys are keepers.

At least for a while.

Recently, I’ve noticed the trend of “bro-zoning.” Basically, like friend-zoning, but in this case, it’s the girls getting friend-zoned, and unlike guys, they stick around and actually care for the guy who turned them down. After many nights of going drink-for-drink and competing in pick-up soccer games, the guy realizes that this girl is a total bro and should be kept around. And if said girl is to develop any type of feelings for said guy, their fate is already settled: they are a bro, and therefore, they will not leave the bro-zone.

What’s the difference between the friend-zone and the bro-zone, you ask? Simple. People who are friend-zoned really don’t talk all that much, they’re just labeled as “friends” for the civil sake of having to interact from time to time. Those who are bro-zoned hang out quite often, spending quality time together and actually get to know each other on a deeper level. Being in the bro-zone sucks.

As a girl, you want to be cool and chill.

And if you’re anything like me, and grew up with brothers, you know how to kick it with boys and actually be a normal, functioning human being who doesn’t complain about their cuticle care every two seconds. After about eight long years, I feel as though I have completely mastered the balance of being a put-together preppy girl while still being able to shoot the breeze and sip whisky with my closest of guy friends.

I’ve been ask many times by my family and other friends why I don’t go for so-and-so, because they’re such a great guy, and we get along so well. Up until recent, I never thought about exploring the option of dating one of these guy friends. And now that it’s on my mind, I can’t get it off. Why don’t I try to date one of my good guy friends?

Because I’m already the bro, that’s why. I’ve been told over and over how cool I am and how chill I am and how I am so easy to talk to by all of my guy friends. I’ve been invited to formals because I’m a great date, who’s down to dance and drink and will put up with pictures for an hour or so while every other girl freaks out about getting the perfect angle. I’m the girl who every guy is dying to go to sorority date night with, because they know we’ll have a good time while having the chance to shamelessly flirt with other girls.

“Why are all girls so crazy? Why can’t they be more like you?” I’ve heard these statements more than enough times. Sometimes, I just want to grab and shake my guy friends, and tell them that I am cool, chill, and 100% datable, even if i’m not super into them, but just to make a point. Where, in the unwritten-but-universally-known rules of the universe, does it say that a girl needs to be certifiably insane, crazy-eyes and all, to be girlfriend material? It doesn’t. But alas, they are stuck in a vicious cycle, unable to realize that sometimes dating a girl you get along with so well, even if she’s in the bro-zone, is the right way to go.

I’m in college. I’m young. I’m on the brink of greatness; I can feel the rest of my life starting to begin, it’s just around the corner. I’m content with not dating anyone right this moment. So I’ll go to that frat party, I’ll crack open a Coors, and shoot the breeze with my friends.

And the next time someone tells me that I’m such a bro, I’ll smile, sip my beer, and say, “No, I’m just a cool girl.” Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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