I imagine meeting you again in a different time, where the wounds are all healed and the scars are too. I imagine meeting you in the most unexpected of places, in the least expected time because that is how it must go.
I’ll be standing in front of you like I’m seeing you for the first time, and you’ll stare at me like a newly met stranger – no past, no present, both unknown to each other.
I’ll smile at you in recognition and you’ll give me a nod – an indication that somehow, you still remember the girl you used to hold in your arms.
Suddenly all the memories will seem to come back in blurred details. How I laughed while you danced silly in front of me. How you kissed my eyes and nose and lips and forehead and suddenly, all in the world wass better. How I came to your door that night and how I cried in your arms one last time.
One last time.
Maybe God fated us to meet again, one last time. May it be for the closure that never was, or for a proper goodbye, but never for a second chance.
But still, I’ll thank God for bringing you right there and then.
I imagine keeping a comfortable distance in between us because anything going beyond the line will go past of what should be.
“Hey,” you will say to me. I will remember your voice – the one that sang me songs and lulled me to sleep every night. It was your very spell, your very charm, that once had me weak on my knees and sent butterflies in my stomach and stars dancing through my head.
“Nice to meet you,” I’ll say, wanting to whisper ‘again,’ and offering my hand to you. Not the best greeting I could offer after not hearing from each other for so long, but that will have to do.
Your hand will meet mine and you’ll give it a light squeeze and perhaps I will remember every detail of your hand, that hand I loved so much before. The hand that I once prayed to God to never leave mine – until it did.
Awkwardness is what my friends would call it if they saw us, but for us, it will be familiarity of something once shared. The feeling of finding something that used to be yours, forever belonging to one another.
Someday, somehow, it’s going to make sense why I will stand right there in front of you and not beside you. Why the ring on my left finger was given by someone else who is not you. Why there is only you and me, and no longer an us.
Someday, I imagine seeing you again, happy in another girl’s arms, while I run back to one who loves me the way you didn’t. And someday it’s going make sense. Someday we will both get the love we never had from each other, the love that we both deserve.
Someday, I’ll meet you again, in a different time when all is forgiven and forgotten. When the love lost is found again in someone else’s arms. Someday I’ll meet you in the most unexpected of places in the least expected time because that is how it must go.
And that will answer why we let each other go.