They walked away.
Perhaps they gave you a last kiss in front of your favorite restaurant or left your gaze to close your front door for the last time. They may have simply left you on read and vanished from your social media feeds. The last bottle of their favorite drink still sits in the fridge as you wonder if one day they will come back to share it with you. Time passing since the last memories you shared is like water in the bath emptying down the drain as you slowly feel the heaviness of gravity pulling you down to the cold empty tub. You want to cry or maybe even talk everything through with someone, but the tears don’t come and you can’t find the words to express the loss.
The present passes fast as you lose yourself in the past, drowning yourself in thoughts about what you did, or maybe it was what you said, or perhaps just who you are. You try to find a tangible reason as to why what was once perfect is now gone. Every blog article you read and friend’s word of advice tells you there’s a new start waiting for you elsewhere, but you can’t bring yourself to start from scratch when you can’t make sense of the heartbreak.
Beyond the feeling of missing them, you begin to doubt your own identity and thoughts. Perhaps even if they told you why it was over, you doubt that you could ever recreate that kind of love with anyone else. The truth is, you’re hurt right now and there is no doubt you will feel pain. However, they didn’t walk away because of the reasons you think.
God hears us every time we cry. He knows when we shed a tear and when our heart is broken, even if nobody else in the world does. When you are rejected time and time again by people in your life, he is there every time to pick you up and listen to how you feel. Even if you have no words to say, he understands your feelings even before you do. You may even argue that perhaps he caused this pain. If he is the one in charge of everything, why did you have to go through this? If he loves you so much, why did he do this to you?
God is a painter. He crafted your life from start to finish and memorized every detail. He can see your entire life story as if it were a completed masterpiece, from the mistakes you will make to the beautiful moments of blessings and surrender. For us, the past and present is all we know. As much as we try to convince ourselves that we can predict the future, nobody around us has all the answers because we are humans with flaws and biases struggling through different things.
Imagine you’re in a film. Right now, you’re living through the closeup on a detail that makes no sense in the moment. Filmmakers call this the “plant”. Currently, that closeup makes no sense and all you can understand is the pain and immediate outcome. Before you know it, the future becomes the present and it pays off. You realize all along, God was setting you up for a much better future. He was protecting you from pain and destruction that would’ve been much more severe than what you went through. In some cases, he may have used that experience or person to shape you into the person he needed you to be or in the right place to meet someone better. There are endless possibilities as to why he does what he does. Even though we may never understand the reasons, he only does what’s best for us.
Even though you’re experiencing pain you can’t explain, call on him and he will be there to help you through all of it. He knows what’s best for you, so have faith and share your burdens with him.