Ever found yourself lost in a crossroad? Where you have to choose between two paths? Should you choose left or right? What if you choose wrongly? What if one way turns out to be easier than the other but you’ve chosen the harder one instead? You then ask yourself, “what if I regret choosing this?’
You wanted to move forward but afraid to do so in case you pick the wrong option.
Don’t you hate that feeling?!
Your gut is telling you to choose one but at the back of your mind, the other seems to be more ideal. You weigh the situation, you check out your options and ponder on what would be the possibilities for each.
I think our hesitation comes from the thought that we might regret the choice that we made – that our chosen path could not live up to our expectation. But what if the path you choose, hard as it may seem at the beginning could give you the miracle you have been waiting for, could be the realization of the dream you have been longing for or could lead you to that one person who is destined for you.
It’s scary not knowing… so you have to choose.
It’s frustrating not knowing… so you have to decide.
It’s consuming not knowing … so you put yourself out there.
Then again, you tell yourself: “How sure are you that it wouldn’t be scary once you’ve made the choice? That you won’t feel frustrated and upset when you finally decide to lay it on the line? How sure are you?”
That’s the deal with life. No guarantees at all.
In my experience, the only choice you have is to choose.
“Darling, just f*ck*ng own it!”
PICK one option, COMMIT to it and GET MOVING.
I’m in no position to tell someone this (to be honest, this is also my constant “note to self”) because like anybody else, I have had my share of moments of doubts and hesitations. I have messed up and f*ck*d up a couple of times. Contrary to other people’s belief, my life hasn’t been all “fairy tale-like” especially after I left home and live abroad. It hasn’t been a bed full of roses. I have made silly mistakes, stupid decisions and have found myself in situations I never thought I’d find myself in. Well, I still have been a good girl for most of the time. But I am not perfect. No one is. No matter how confusing our situation may be, we always have a choice. Also, we are all entitled to our own decisions, own choices and own doings. This is our life, so why don’t we just f*ck*ng own it. And not feel sorry or guilty about it.
You don’t owe anyone explanation. Stop pleasing other people. It makes life lighter and easier.
“It is not in the stars to hold our destiny but in ourselves.” – William Shakespeare
When you put your whole heart and mind into something and you fully commit to it, you can do it. There’s always a way to do something. The result may or may not be what we expect it to be but there is always a way. It might be hard, it might take time, it might hurt but it’s POSSIBLE.
Not too long ago, I thought I couldn’t get over someone. I thought there’s no way I could forget about this person. He had left a mark on me – a wound that took a while to heal. At the time, I made a decision to love this person no matter what. I’ve encountered several crossroads while in that relationship – some choices led me to better roads, others pushed me to worse ones.
Did I love him? Yes.
Did it hurt? So bad.
Did I regret it? No.
I chose to love him. I chose to stay even if it was already hurting. I chose to let go when it’s time despite not knowing what comes next. I chose not to regret it.
I’ve made a choice and owned it.
I fully embraced both the joy and tears that came with it.
I wouldn’t have known the beauty and pain of opening my heart if I hadn’t been lost in a crossroad once, twice or more.
Finally, I got a little brave. Truth is, making a choice doesn’t always feel good or nice or pretty. It can feel terrifying. It can hurt. It’s disappointing and hard.
And so, it’s hard..it hurts – but the hurt sets you free.
The most important thing is to take action, in one direction or another. Once you’re moving, you’ll swiftly feel whether it’s the right direction for you. If not, you could always adjust your wings and fly the other way.
So much in life is experiential. Go on. Do the bravest, most liberating thing. Decide and…
“Darling, just f*ck*ng own it!”