10 Things White People Are Ruining

Featureflash / Shutterstock.com
Featureflash / Shutterstock.com

Columbusing is a term I’ve recently discovered on the internet that accurately describes white people taking what isn’t theirs, and making it their own. It is more commonly known as cultural appropriation. From Vogue calling 2014 the era of the big booty, to Twitter proclaiming Iggy and Macklemore the “King and Queen of Rap,” white people are claiming it all. THOT may be next.

1. Basic

This term has been thoroughly exhausted. Basic initially meant that someone was unsophisticated, extremely average, and still bought club dresses at Rainbow (sorry white people who have never heard of this store). Now, you’re basic if you spend daddy’s money on pumpkin spice lattes and UGG boots…still not sure how this new definition came about, or why pumpkin flavored things are “basic.”

2. Turn Up, Turnt Up, Turned Up

Pretty sure this term originated from a junkie in Atlanta who was high on crack. But southern rap made it popular in party songs, and now everyone uses it to mean drinking/partying excessively. But white people use it under any circumstance now. “Pretty Little Liars is on, turn up!” “It’s Tuesday, turn up!” No, sit your basic ass down. You have work tomorrow.

3. Twerking

This began in the 90s, so white people are super late with this one. But nonetheless, white people have taken it to a whole new level. “Twerking: white girls in yoga pants having sex with the air.” Thank you Urban Dictionary. Is anyone else disturbed by the fact that 13-year-old girls are posting twerk videos all over the internet now? Why is this the norm?!

4. Ghetto

Just because you used duct tape for a quick fix, does not mean it is ghetto. Neither is any meal you eat, or any area that isn’t an all-white suburb. “OMG, that’s soo ghetto!” No it’s not. It’s just broken. Stop being racist.

5. Urban

Piggybacking off ghetto…most of the time, you just mean black, but you’re afraid saying black will make you appear racist, so you use urban instead. Black does not equal urban, and urban does not equal black. Same goes for ghetto. Please refer to a dictionary.

6. Ballin’ and Bling Bling

Again, this is 2014, not the 90s. You just sound like a douche. Feel free to join the 21st century anytime now.

7. Shade

I think white people have actually got the correct definition of what being shady, or throwing shade is. But still, it is extremely overused, and in unnecessary situations. For example, A: “No, I don’t want salad today,” B: “Ooooo throwing shade to lettuce!” I don’t it’s possible to disrespect a vegetable…Simmer down.

8. Ethnic

The term white people use when describing something that isn’t “white enough.” Just stop.

9. Swag

Another term that has taken on multiple meanings, and that has been ridiculously overplayed. It’s not just someone’s presentation and aura anymore, everything is “swag” now. Don’t have work tomorrow, SWAG. Just picked up my dry cleaning, SWAG. Please make it stop.

10. Ratchet

Used interchangeably with ghetto (refer to #4). Again, white people use this term in unnecessary situations, and even sometimes think it’s “racket.” White people, stop. You’re doing it wrong. #Shade TC mark

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