You’ve probably heard it a thousand times from your family and friends. You deliberately shut those voices around you telling you to stop. You come up with several excuses to those that matter, just to get them off your back.
“We had a petty argument.”
“It’s my fault we’re like this.”
“I was hormonal.”
But the only voice that doesn’t seem to go away is the one that matters the most. YOU.
You know deep down they’re right. You know the oldest adage in the book.
“Love yourself first before you can love anyone else.”
But how are you supposed to just drop everything and start from scratch? You think you’ve already invested so much of your time in your relationship, that going back to zero would be suicide. You got so used to revolving your life around someone that when that person leaves, a whole part of you becomes nonexistent. Like you’ve never existed and somehow lose yourself in the process.
Who’s going to love me now? Will I be alone for the rest of my life?
But you know deep down that you deserve someone better.
Someone who not only loves you but also likes you when you’re around. You want someone who needs you as much as you need them. A person who stays faithful even when you’re out of sight. Someone who sees you as a priority and not just an option. Someone who likes being with you and has pride in his eyes to call you his. You are worthy of someone who makes you think love isn’t hard.
Doubts come creeping up your mind when you’re alone and you shrug them off as easily as they appear. You know you can’t talk to anyone about these silly thoughts, you say. Saying them out loud makes them true, so you just wait it out. Hoping and praying that these erratic thoughts you’ve been having lately would all just go away. You try to bury the noise inside you but it has shook you from your reverie, feeling guilty for even entertaining the idea that there will never be a future with him. Deep down you know they’re right. That little voice telling you to leave is getting louder and louder. You know that he will never see you the way you see him. And all those heart wrenching quotes you’ve been reading? Yes, it hurts doesn’t it? It strikes a painful nerve in your chest. You can’t breathe. You feel trapped. You feel more alone than you’ve ever been. You feel lost.
But you know you’ve been dragging this on way longer than it should. I’m telling you, you’re stronger than you think. It will hurt like hell and it will probably will. But you know it’s time.
You need to let him go.