People enter our lives for a reason. They come and go satisfying a need for companionship, love, social stimulation or many other emotional and physical needs. Some stay for years, become a partner in crime, grow and change with us, while others stay for a much shorter period of time than we might have liked. Regardless of when the time comes for us to say goodbye to an individual, we either find ourselves embracing their exit or incredibly pained by the transition.
By nature, individuals are forever changing. It’s an endless cycle as we grow through the developmental phases of life towards the new identity our body will take on in the next phase. Through this creative, professional and emotional growth, we are more than a few different people over the years. It can be troublesome to embrace this self-transformation on our own let alone the inevitable effect it will have on our relationships as well.
As you take on your new role in your next phase, you are accepting that your creative self might be larger than you originally thought; your dreams, perspectives shift, and your wants and needs in a relationship grow with you. Accepting that someone, whether a dear friend or someone you’ve only just met but have an affinity for, might not be changing with you can be painful.
Drifting in and out of one another’s life, we all serve each other a purpose. We teach one another lessons and learn new things about life. Once that purpose has been fulfilled, or that knowledge has been passed and lesson has been learned, we go our separate ways.
Accepting this, the fact that some people might have already served their purpose in our life, accepting that some people might not fully support us and our growth, not on purpose but just because you are no longer aligned, can be painful. You may associate with someone for 30 years before a time comes that you no longer serve one another a positive purpose and have to let go.
Letting go or walking away from a relationship doesn’t mean you love that person any less. It doesn’t mean you don’t think of them, or don’t still keep a slice of love for them in your heart. If you’re naturally heading on separate paths, it can be very peaceful to just accept the love you will forever have and keep on swimming.
There are also some people you will never walk away from no matter how different your life’s paths become. In order to keep these people around sometimes we just have to re-evaluate the relationship. Find the new place for it in your life. When things get rocky, ask yourself if there is an amount of rocks that will make you walk away. If not, find the new place that this relationship now fits in your life. Whether you’re experiencing the loss of someone or loving the impact said individual has on your current life, shapeshifting with your relationship is what will make a good bond, a good love, great.