Healing from heartbreak isn’t like just getting back up on the monkey bars. And even that as a kid can be challenging—getting back up once you’ve fallen and finding the courage to try again, fully aware you may fall once more.
But mending damage from a broken heart can irrationally leave you feeling like you’ll never get back up. Like you’ll never find someone who can love you deeply again. Like you are unlovable.
But despite how much you may believe it now, you are not unlovable.
You are not unlovable; you are healing. Wounds hurt when they’re pressed on. Scars take time to fade. And what you are experiencing is a restorative process. It’s a careful yet unavoidable transition that will leave you better off and stronger than before. But it is not a locked state or forever experience. Humans are built to withstand temporary damage.
You are not unlovable; you are learning the importance of self-love. It does not mean you were broken before, but it means you’re breaking free of the subconscious self-judgment that you may have carried. It is confronting your insecurities and learning to love who you are inside and out. You are becoming your best self, yet who you have always been deep down.
You are not unlovable; you are improving your standards. You are learning how to say no to something that is no longer serving you. You will not settle for one-sided relationships that drain you. You are learning that actions will always triumph words, no matter how delicately crafted words might seem. You will learn to protect your energy and who you choose to give your time to.
You are not unlovable, because every human deserves love, including you. Maybe you have made mistakes. Maybe you stayed in a toxic relationship for too long. Maybe you are tired of being disappointed in a relationship, but this doesn’t mean you aren’t deserving of all the love in the world. Every day you wake up, you have the choice to become the strong human that you were put on this earth to be. Every day you can choose to open up your heart and the idea of receiving love.
And one day, you’ll find that person who loves you unquestionably and will make you feel silly for ever thinking you were unlovable.