First dates are notorious for winning the titles of awkward, nerve-wracking, or just plain ‘oh-dear-god-I’m-so-embarrassed-that-I’m-never-going-to-leave-my-room-again’ bad. Here are 11 things to absolutely NOT do on your first date under any circumstances just to help make it a bit less painful.
1. Glaring intently at him and asking what his intentions are. Not giving him the benefit of the doubt and constantly insisting that you refuse to be a one night stand.
2. Begin swiping on one of many dating apps right in front of him. For obvious reasons.
3. Showing him pictures of hot girls on Instagram and asking if she’s prettier than you, then proceeding to sulk at him regardless of his answer. Just don’t.
4. Pretending to be someone you’re not. It’s okay that you don’t know how football or touchdowns work. In the same sense, he probably doesn’t care about why Peter from Rachel’s season of The Bachelorette should definitely be the next Bachelor.
5. Constantly talk about how annoying your ex is but how you also ‘swear you’re completely over him.’
6. Essentially narrating the entire date to your BFF via text with a play by play of what he said vs. what he actually means, including trying to analyze his passive aggressive “wow, I hate when people are constantly on their phones.”
7. Ordering the most expensive item on the menu aka triple guac (is that even a thing? Cause it should be) on your burrito bowl at Chipotle and expect him to be your Sugar Daddy. We can hold our own bill-wise, ladies.
8. Ordering a salad cause “I’m not that hungry.” Then proceeding to eat all his fries saying “oh, I’ll just have one.”
9. Taking a call from your roommate because giving her guy advice over the phone right now is a very important matter at the moment and then proceeding to rant about how the entire male species are hopeless d-bags.
10. Borderline bragging about how many dates you’ve been on and how he’d better step his game up to beat out the long list of guys fighting to win you over.
11. Having one too many before showing up. Yes, a shot or two of liquid courage is more than okay, but maybe don’t be completely blacked out. After all, isn’t the morning after story way more fun to tell your friends when you actually remember who said what?