Let’s be real. We don’t keep our exes on our social media because we’re still besties and everything is peachy keen. If you haven’t deleted them altogether in a fit of rage, you’re keeping them around to keep tabs on them. You want to see if they’re happy or not without you, all the while keeping access open so they can see how happy you are (or are perceived to be) without them. We’ve all done it. Whether you think it will help you get over them or keep them close, we all have our reasons.
1. To see if they’re dating someone new.
You check in periodically to see if there are any updates regarding anyone new–new Facebook friends, new statuses, new check-ins, new tagged photos. “Who the hell is this Natalie chick that tagged him in a post about playing Cards Against Humanity?? What does that even mean?!” An hour later, you’re four photo albums deep in her page making brutal assumptions about her moral character.
2. To keep tabs on their new relationship (and when it ends).
If and when they do move on to someone new (they always do), you’re sure as shit keeping tabs on that like a hawk. When they post ambiguous statuses about being sad, you secretly hope they broke up. You’re not sure what you would do if they actually did break up, but it would be a small victory for you. You wouldn’t ever voice it aloud, but you’d do a little happy dance on the inside.
3. To make sure they know you’re working out.
“The best form of revenge is a good body,” said best by my girl Khloe Kardashian. It always makes us feel better when our ex looks like shit post-breakup. Personally, I throw myself into a workout regimen to keep my spirits up. Luckily, that goes hand in hand with not only feeling better, but looking better. And I make damn sure that ex knows what he’s missing out on!
4. To know where they check-in.
Whatever your prerogative is, you either keep tabs on this to possibly-maybe-not-on-purpose-but-on-purpose show up where they are or to avoid them like the plague. Maybe you wouldn’t mind “running into them” at the bar knowing damn well you and your girls are looking fierce. Or maybe you only want to ever see that prick’s face again through the safety of a computer screen.
5. To be updated on their major life changes.
You were probably already aware of what life goals your ex had and you’re curious to see if they succeeded or not. Just because you’re not together anymore, it would still make you happy to know they got that job promotion or finally took that trip to Thailand they always talked about.
6. To keep them close in whatever capacity.
Social media allows us to hold on to someone that, in reality, we would probably never see again. You look at their page and their photos to be reminded of them–to be reminded of your time together. You want to hold on to anything that will allow you to feel close to them again and, since they’re accessible, you keep holding on because you can.
7. To feel the pain.
We’re all a bit masochistic sometimes. We have to be exposed to the pain; we need to feel it to feel close to that person. Or, we think of it as exposure therapy in hopes we’ll get over them. It may sound crazy, but you think that if you allow yourself to see their photos with someone else or read their statuses showing that they’ve moved on, you’re simply forced to deal with those difficult feelings. Maybe. Just maybe you can move on. Either way, sometimes we just want to feel the pain because it’s better than feeling nothing.
8. To see if they’re happy or not without you.
Bottom line–you want to know if they’re capable of being happy without you. You read their statuses and tweets, you pour over their Instagrams, and read the articles they share to see if you can interpret their happiness (or unhappiness). Whether you no longer have feelings for them or you want them to live a life of regret after they dumped you, we essentially want to know if our exes are “better off” without us or not.