1. There is never any food, anywhere, at any time.
You spend your days searching the kitchen for any sort of scrap to satisfy your hunger, but with no luck. You dream of the days when your fridge will be full of food, but realize it might be a long time coming.
2. The tone and overall misery of this song pretty much epitomizes your life.
Sure, you and your family love each other, but sometimes it sure feels like you’re all just stuck with one another.
3. Holidays, birthdays, and celebrations of any kind are disasters.
You depend on money for gifts because without them you’re forced to just enjoy each other’s company… and, no… just no.
4. The neighbor always pops into your house, even though it’s clear they are not wanted or liked.
You make fun of them behind their back, and to their face, but nothing you do seems to stop coming over.
5. The sex life of your parents is a trainwreck — a trainwreck that you’re aware of.
You have to fight back the “ewwws” every single time you overhear or see the back and forth of your parents’ sexual relationship.
6. You have a dog (or pet) that sort of just wanders around doing their own thing.
Half the time you don’t even know where they are. But at the end of the day, they are an important member of the family, especially since they seem to get more food than the humans in the house.
7. Your family is cursed.
Bad luck follows you everywhere and life always seems to find a way to punch you in the gut right when you think things are going well. You’re convinced one of your ancestors pissed off the wrong person.
8. The siblings in your family make fun of each other incessantly.
It goes beyond basic sibling rivalry. They take every single opportunity to jab one another, whenever, wherever. No one can mock the other better than they can.
9. When you or the breadwinner returns home from work the house is subject to a major rant about how terrible your job is.
The venting happens so frequently that some of the stories start to sound the same.
10. One person in the family took all of the good-looking genes… however, they pay the price by being a little bit (read: much) dumber than everyone else.
It’s hard to make fun of them, because no matter what he or she is still the cutest in the family.
11. Whoever said fighting doesn’t solve anything was obviously an idiot.
Your family is not afraid to get down and dirty, and throw some fists when the time comes. You can go from a zero to a ten if someone says or does the wrong thing. You know your family has your back.
12. You and your family make fun of each other and torture each other pretty much 100% of the time. HOWEVER, when someone from the outside hurts someone inside the family, it means war.
People need to steer clear unless they want major trouble. It’s sweet when you think about it.