I just want you to know that I’m okay.
You’ve up and left after months of sharing love and commitment with me, but I’ll make it on my own. I’ll keep living my life, and eventually I’ll start to enjoy it again. But, even though you shut the door behind you, I haven’t changed the locks yet. You can come back whenever you want, and I’ll still be here.
It’s hard to think that the person I spent years with, sleep with, eat with, travel with and planned my life with is now gone. However, it doesn’t have to stay that way. We can go back to taking midnight walks through the city and having dinner to our favourite restaurant. It will be like you never left because I believe that you aren’t gone completely; a piece of your heart is still here. It’s not because I don’t think I can live without you. It’s not because I think life isn’t worth living when you’re not around. It’s because I understand why you left.
The concept of ‘forever’ is daunting, and it’s scary to think that this could be the last relationship you’ll ever have. The concept of ‘commitment’ is intimidating, and it’s hard to think that you’ll never kiss another person again. I had those doubts, too, but I pushed them aside because I knew that you were worth every concern and crisis.
The key to getting through those doubts is to work together. It’s to take a second, or third, or fourth look at your partner and realise that you share something with them that you know you’ll never have with someone else. We both cope in different ways; I just wish you’d have tried harder to work through these issues rather than just packing up and heading off.
So, I understand where your uncertainty came from. While I don’t like the way you dealt with it, I won’t hold it against you.
I just want you to know that you can come back. It doesn’t mean I’m weak, and it doesn’t mean I’m scared to be alone. It means I understand. I miss you. I’ll be waiting.