14 Things Only Show Choir Kids Know

Glee: The Complete Third Season
Glee: The Complete Third Season

1. Even drunk, your impromptu performances are on point.

Every time you’re a little tipsy, you do the choreography to one of your old show choir songs. Nobody can do a better drunken box step than you.

2. You love massage trains.

The best part of vocal warms-ups was always standing in a line and getting a massage…IN CLASS. No really, this was a daily, teacher-mandated task. Bonus if you had a crush on the bass standing next you. Amirite, ladies?

3. You’re totally comfortable being naked in public.

Quick costume change? Not a problem, just drop your pants right where you’re standing. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve changed on a bus, or ran around backstage with little to no clothes on. It’s not even in a dirty way, it just happens. Choir kids love nudity.

4. You have a complicated affection for Glee comparisons.

When Glee first came out, you realized how accurate it was and went onto assign characters to every single one of your choir friends. But any time someone mentions Glee, you tell him or her that you didn’t actually get to sing pop songs in choir. Not fair.

5. ‘525,600 Minutes’


Every big event in your life inspires you to sing ‘Seasons of Love’ from Rent…and it still gives you chills.

6. You actually know solfege.


The Sound of Music ain’t got nothing on your Do, Re, Mi. Although how horrible was sight reading?

7. You’re a stickler for technique.

You always get upset when you’re watching American Idol or The Voice, and the singers have horrible breath support, diction, vowels, etc… It’s “At You,” NOT “Atchu”.

8. You know all the words to every song on the Wicked soundtrack.

In fact, you’ve probably performed ‘Defying Gravity’ or ‘For Good’ at one of your choir concerts. If not, don’t act like you haven’t thought about it.

9. You watch sports for all the wrong reasons:

You may not know the difference between a touch down and a goal, but you sure as hell can judge a halftime performance and/or a rendition of the National Anthem. Which brings us to our next point…

10. You know the 4-part harmony to the Star-Spangled Banner.

While you’ve always dreamt of singing the National Anthem like Whitney Houston, that’s not how choir kids do it. You sing your part with pride at every sporting event, which isn’t a lot…because sports and choir kids don’t really match.

11. Sister Act 2 will always be one of your favorite movies.

The first one’s good, but can we talk about the second one? Lauryn Hill AND a rapping gospel choir? It doesn’t get better. It just doesn’t.

12. Band kids were, are, and will always be be your mortal enemies.

That whole rival between choir and band kids that you read about is real, and you can spot a band kid from a mile away. How annoying were those kids who were in both?

13. At one point in your life you knew you were going to be a Broadway star.

The first trip you took to New York City changed your life, and you knew you were destined to be the next Kristen Chenoweth. WATCH OUT, WORLD. I WANT TO BE A PART OF IT.

14. You have a varsity letter, but no jacket.


You were in the top choir in high school, so you got a varsity letter. No matter how proud you were of it, you were still too embarrassed to get a varsity jacket that said “Show Choir”. TC mark

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