To Anyone Who Has To Breakup With Toxic Parents: It’s Going To Be Okay

An open letter to the kids, teenagers and adults who have broken up with their toxic parents. Always remember, that we are the brave bitches.

Maybe it was your mother, or your father. Maybe it was a combined effort. Maybe you tried your hardest to forgive them for all the treacherous things they have done to you. Maybe you did forgive them and maybe you just can’t.

It is okay. 

People will judge you. People will tell you that you should love them, for you only get one set of parents. You need to know you don’t have to love anyone who doesn’t respect you. No matter the relation. You need to know that it’s okay to not love anyone who hurts you, intentionally probing at the weakest parts of you, just to see you crumble. You need to know that it is okay not to love someone purely based on because they brought you into this world. Your parents are not exempt from treating you like a human being.

Sure, you might have never been starved as a child. You always had food on the table, a roof over your head, clothes on your back. Some would say that’s all the important ingredients you need to raise a child. Though, I disagree. A child should not have to beg for the love of a parent. I wish I could take away your pain, anguish, trauma and whatever else your parents happily gave to you on a silver platter.

But I’m here to tell you that it isn’t your fault. 

It is important to tell yourself this. That it isn’t your fault. Keep telling yourself this. Remind yourself of this when the going gets particularly tough. Whatever you decided to do.

It is okay

Whether it was exterminating them from your life completely, or just keeping them at arm’s length.

it is okay

and

it is okay to let them go.