1. You’re looking for a serious commitment — and he won’t put a label on the relationship. Sleeping with him isn’t going to convince him to date you. It isn’t going to open his eyes to what an amazing girlfriend you would make. Sleeping with him, without expecting anything in return, is giving him exactly what he wants. There’s no guarantee he’s going to change his mind about you. He could walk away tomorrow. He doesn’t owe you anything, so don’t assume giving him access to your body is going to lead to a happily ever after.
2. You feel like he’s only using you for your body. You don’t want a guy who refuses to hang out with you when you’re on your period or who rolls their eyes when you tell them you’re not in the mood. You want someone who is happy to spend time with you, whether or not you’re wearing your clothes. If he only cares about whether he’s going to get laid, he’s not going to rise to your expectations. You need to kick him to the curb sooner rather than later.
3. You feel worse after sex, not better. You should be enjoying sex. If he’s the only one getting any pleasure out of the deal, something is wrong. You should be orgasming, too. You should be feeling on top of the world, too. If he fails to satisfy you, if he makes you feel insecure, or if he makes you feel uncomfortable, then you are not in the right relationship. Sex should feel empowering. It should raise your confidence. It should make you feel reassured you’re with the right person.
4. The sex is actually fantastic — but your relationship is a mess. Maybe your sex life is thriving. Maybe you make each other feel incredible in the bedroom. But if you’re destroying each other’s lives outside of the bedroom, you don’t want to continue dating. Sex isn’t enough to keep a relationship strong. As tempting as it is to stay with someone who makes you feel great physically, you cannot allow yourself to settle for someone who makes you feel like shit emotionally.
5. You aren’t the only person your partner has been sleeping with lately. Staying with a cheater isn’t worth the trouble. Not only are you going to get your heart shattered, but you could end up with an STD if they aren’t being careful or getting tested. You don’t want to put your heart or your body through pain for someone who doesn’t respect you enough to stay loyal. You deserve better than someone unfaithful.
6. You’ve lost the desire to sleep with him. You don’t owe anyone your body. If you don’t feel like having sex, that’s a good enough reason not to sleep with someone. You don’t have to make up an excuse about having a headache or stomachache. You don’t have to justify yourself. You can simply admit you aren’t interested. You can leave them in your rearview without any guilt, because your body belongs to you.