20 Insanely Important Things I Learned About Sex In My 20s 

20 Insanely Important Things I Learned About Sex In My 20s 

1. Sleeping with someone who isn’t looking for a casual relationship isn’t going to convince them to date you. It’s only going to get your heart broken.

2. Make-up sex is great and all, but you should also have a real, serious discussion about your issues. Otherwise, the sex is simply a distraction.

3. Sex with one person is going to be wildly different from sex with another person. The same moves and positions aren’t going to work well on everyone.

4. Women deserve to orgasm, too. Not only on holidays or birthdays or anniversaries. Every single time you have sex.

5. You’re allowed to say no to sex without lying about having a headache or being on your period. If you’re not in the mood, you’re not in the mood.

6. Sex isn’t going to save a toxic relationship. It’s only going to prolong it.

7. Assholes are going to judge you for being inexperienced or for being too experienced. You can’t win, which is why you should make your own choices and do what you want. Don’t worry about what anyone else thinks.

8. Always have safe sex. If someone refuses to wear a condom, refuse to sleep with them.

9. Don’t feel bad when someone whines about having blue balls. They can take care of the problem themselves. You don’t have to sleep with them out of guilt.

10. Sex is supposed to feel good for you, too. If you’re counting down the minutes until it’s over, then you should have a nice long talk with your partner about how things need to change so you can both have a good time.

11. You don’t have to give your partner a blowjob, just because you’re on your period. You can have sex on your period. Or you can do absolutely nothing. The right person won’t whine either way.

12. Sex with an ex is never harmless. It’s going to lead to a complicated scenario you wish you would’ve avoided.

13. Your number doesn’t matter. Anyone who believes it matters should stop mattering to you.

14. There’s not a set amount of time you should wait before having sex with someone. If you want to wait a few months, that’s fine. If you can’t wait until the end of your first date, that’s fine, too.

15. You don’t have to share the details of your sex life with your friends. Some things are better left private.

16. Sex with the wrong person will make you feel even more insecure about yourself. Sex with the right person will make you feel even better about yourself.

17. Being insecure about the way you look or taste or smell is a waste of your time. The less self-conscious you are, the more fun you’re going to have in the bedroom.

18. Using sex toys doesn’t mean your partner sucks at sex. It’s actually a great way to explore each other’s bodies better.

19. You should pee after sex in order to save yourself from the hell that is a UTI.

20. Sex doesn’t have to be meaningful. But a lot of the time, the best sex means a lot to you both. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

January Nelson is a writer, editor, and dreamer. She writes about astrology, games, love, relationships, and entertainment. January graduated with an English and Literature degree from Columbia University.

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