Planning a wedding is stressful enough on its own. Now that there’s a global pandemic, it’s even more stressful. It’s hard to make it through the day when so much is weighing on your mind, when your emotions are all over the place, when you’re in a constant state of misery.
1. Impatience. You wish you knew what was going to happen. You wish you knew whether you were going to have to cancel your wedding or whether everything was going to work out the way you originally planned. But things keep changing every single day. There’s really no way to tell what’s going to happen a day from now, let alone a few weeks from now or a few days from now, so you just have to be patient. You have to wait and see what happens.
2. Depression. You cannot believe you’ve spent your entire life daydreaming about this moment — and you can’t even enjoy it. This is supposed to be the happiest time of your life, a major milestone, and it’s completely ruined. You thought this year would be the greatest year of your life, but you were wrong. Nothing is going as planned. Everything is falling apart. And it’s hard to cope with that reality.
3. Jealousy. It’s not fair that everyone else you know was able to have a beautiful wedding before all of this happened. It’s not fair that they were able to have bridal showers and bachelorette parties without canceling. It’s not fair that this is happening to you. It’s just not fair.
4. Guilt. Even though you know you have a right to be upset about your wedding, a huge part of you feels guilty for complaining. People are getting sick. People are dying. People are grieving. In the grand scheme of things, your wedding isn’t that big of a deal, so you feel horrible for caring so much. You feel like a bad, selfish bridezilla.
5. Annoyance. Even though there are a million things you still need to do before your big day, there are certain things you cannot physically plan because businesses are closed. You can send emails and maybe you’ll get an answer if you’re lucky — but you’re not going to be able to try on your dress at the store or pick out rings in person or go to a cake tasting. You don’t know how you’re going to get everything done by your wedding day when your planning time is getting cut short.
6. Worry. You’re worried your wedding is going to get canceled and you’re going to lose thousands of dollars. Even if things do go as planned, you’re worried someone you care about is going to get sick and won’t be able to make it to your wedding. Even if no one gets sick, you’re worried everyone will be on edge and no one is going to dance, no one is going to hug, no one is going to have a good time. You’re worried your wedding is going to be a disaster.
7. Excitement. No matter what happens, there’s still a part of you that is excited because you know you’ve found your forever person. You know, one way or another, you’re going to get married at the end of this. You’re going to say, “I do” beside your favorite person in the world. And that’s a beautiful thing.