1. You’re allowed to tell other people to go fuck themselves. When someone pisses you off, you don’t have to be nice about it. You’re allowed to get angry. You’re allowed to use your voice. You don’t have to act polite in order to keep the peace. You’re allowed to speak your mind, even though it might make other people uncomfortable.
2. No matter what you do, you’re going to be the bad guy in someone else’s story. You have to stop worrying about pleasing others, because some people are going to hate you regardless of how well you treat them. Some people are going to spread lies about you. Some people are going to swear you were the one in the wrong, even when they were the liar, the cheater, the manipulator. And the worst part is, other people are going to believe them. But you can’t allow that to upset you too much. You can’t be too concerned with how other people view you. As long as you know you did the right thing, that’s all that matters.
3. Family is bullshit. The idea that you have to stay loyal to the people who raised you is beyond toxic. You make your own family. You have absolutely no obligation to keep in contact with a parent or sibling or cousin who treats you like shit. You don’t owe them anything. Not a phone call. Not a holiday card. Not a friend request on social media. Your real family has nothing to do with DNA. Your real family are the people who love and support you exactly as you are.
4. You’re fucking beautiful. Don’t let anyone tell you differently — and don’t let anyone make you feel differently. If you feel like shit whenever you see a certain someone, there’s an issue. You shouldn’t be hanging around people who make you feel bad about yourself, even if they do it in subtle ways. Spend more time with people who adore you, flaws and all, and less time with people who pressure you to change.
5. Everyone is a fuckup in their own way. Some people have hurt you in unacceptable ways, which is why you refuse to allow them back in your life. But it works the other way around, too. There are some people you’ve hurt pretty badly, and if they never want to see your face again, you should respect that. You can’t continue chasing them, hoping they change their mind. You can’t get pissed at them for refusing to accept your apology either. You have to accept their decision and try not to hurt anyone else the same way in the future.
6. Some people are assholes. You don’t have to try to see the good in every single person. You don’t have to take the high road or be the bigger person whenever you get into a confrontation. Some people aren’t worth the trouble. They’re assholes, plain and simple. There’s nothing you can do to change them or their minds about the way they view the world. There’s no way you can help them, and sticking around is only going to bring you down, so your only choice is to walk away. Put them in your past. Don’t bother dealing with them again.