Aries: March 21 – April 19th
Nursing a hangover from Saturday night.
Taurus: April 20th – May 20th
Spending time with family members you make an effort to avoid the rest of the year.
Gemini: May 21st – June 20th
All of the calories you’re going to consume from chocolate bunnies and marshmallows.
Cancer: June 21st – July 22nd
Spending money on baskets and eggs.
For the person who is always googling astrological compatibility when they meet someone new.
How You’ll Do Everything Based On Your Zodiac Sign includes an exhaustive analysis of each sign’s personality. You’ll learn which high school clique represents them (Pisces are the cool art kids), who would get eaten first in a scary movie (Gemini, obviously) to how each sign prefers to say ‘I love you’ (for Taurus, it’s with good food). Alternating between silly, sweet, and serious, this book is filled with deep dives into the mind of everyone whose birth chart you can get your hands on.
Buy nowLeo: July 23rd – August 22nd
Waking up early.
Virgo: August 23rd – September 22nd
The political rants you know someone in your family is going to start.
Libra: September 23rd – October 22nd
Pretending to be in a good mood.
Scorpio: October 23rd – November 21st
Spending money on a holiday you don’t particularly care about.
Sagittarius: November 22nd – December 21st
Having to listen to screaming children all day.
Capricorn: December 22nd – January 19th
Getting dragged to church.
Aquarius: January 20th – February 18th
Being forced to dress up when you usually spend Sunday in sweatpants.
Pisces: February 19th – March 20th
The questions from family about your relationship status. 
