1. My friend’s go-to is to dip her fingers in her drink, flick it onto the guy’s shirt, and say, “Let’s get you out of these wet clothes.” Yes, she’s hot, and probably doesn’t need the line, but it cracks me up every time.
2. I was walking around the produce section of the grocery store when I was about 21, and this man (prob in his 70’s) suddenly approached me. He goes, “Whatever you do, don’t go in the frozen food aisle!” I was caught off guard and said, “What? Why?” And he broke out into a grin and said, “Because you’ll melt EVERYTHING!” I just burst out laughing. Still makes me smile to this day.
3. Sitting at a table in a restaurant my buddy tells the waitress “I’m really sorry, this is so embarrassing, but my friend (points to me) is a little shy and he wanted me to ask you if you think I’m cute.” It threw her off guard for a second but when she realized what he said she giggled and then gave him her number.
4. “Are you a hitman? Because at this point I’m willing to pay someone to take me out.”
5. My local coffeeshop has bonfires sometimes and they provide marshmallows. I roasted a marshmallow and approached a girl. I said “what do you and this marshmallow have in common? You both look like a snack”. She responded way better than I anticipated.
6. “How you doin’?”
“Baby, I didn’t ask you how you look, I asked how you doin’.”
The delivery was as good as the line was, too.
7. I once went up to a guy and asked him “hey, are you looking for a really lousy dance partner? Cause then I’m your girl!”
It worked and I definitely lived up to the hype I created for myself by being a complete rhythm-less mess.
8. Back when I was working at a bar, heard a girl offer a guy to come home with her and watch porn on her flat-screen mirror. Smoothest line I have ever heard.
9. “Do you have a quarter?”
(I start digging through my pencil bag for at least 3 min looking for one because I swear I saw one in here not too long ago.)
Why? Because he needed it to call his mom and tell her he found the woman of his dreams.
As a sophomore in high school I was shooketh.
10. A dude once got me with this one.
“Feel this shirt.”
“You know what that’s made of?”
11. Girl at a nightclub was fixing her makeup in front of a mirror in a hallway. So I asked her “What are you doing?” she replied “What do you mean?” I told her “You are already a 10/10 it’s not like you can look any better”. She grabbed my hand and it led to a one night stand. The irony was that I thought she was way out of my league, so the line was actually a genuine compliment as I was already on my way to leave and I had no expectations that it could lead anywhere. So maybe the fact that I meant it genuinely was what made it work – but I’m not sure if women can detect/read that into us?
12. “Are you looking for the best sex of your life girl?”
“Then I’m your guy!”
13. On my first date with my ex we were sitting at the bar. I was being kind of awkward and shy at first as you are, on top of everything it was a tinder date so it only added to the levels of awkwardness. So I’m sitting kinda far away and he just puts his foot on the stool and drags me towards him, says something like “let’s get you closer.” I could have melted right then and there. The chemistry was already there so it wasn’t threatening at all. Oof.
14. “You’re like a trophy fish… I don’t know whether I should eat you or mount you.”
15. “Are you today’s date? Because you’re 10/10.” Only works on October 10, but it was gold.
16. First time I heard this it worked on me:
Her: “Quick question: do you know How much a polar bear weighs?”
Me: “I’m not sure”
Her: “Enough to break the ice. I’m Virginia…”
To be fair, she was a pathological liar but absolutely incomparable in the bedroom…and living room…and car…and park…and … you get the idea.
17. Step 1: Get some limes
Step 2: Cut said limes
Step 3: Bring cut limes to social event/area and drop them in front of potential mate
Step 4: Say the following: “Sorry… I’m really bad at pickup limes.”
18. “I’m jealous of your heart right now.”
“Because it’s pounding away inside of you and I’m not.”
19. Step one:- make eye contact
Step two:- beckon her over with 1 finger
Step three:- when she arrives within earshot say, “Well I just made you come with 1 finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand”
Step four:- profit!
20. “Do you have an ugly boyfriend?”
21. “If you won the lottery for the amount of your phone number, how much would you have won?”
22. When Carly Rae Jepsen’s “Call Me Maybe” was popular, I was a server. One night 2 or the 4 guys at my table were flirting with me and asked of I have a boyfriend. After they left one of when left a note that said “hey I just met you and this is crazy but here’s my number call me maybe” with his number.
23. Him- Why are you single?
Me- Because my parents are strict. Why are you single?
Him- Because your parents are strict.
24. I’ve used one pickup line in my life. Ironically, two girls at a bar I was working at were discussing pick up lines, and asked me for my favorite one. I took one of the girls by the hand, looked her in the eye, and said,
“The only reason I’d kick you out of bed…would be to fuck you on the floor.”
25. My wife and I were at a party once and she was chatting with this dude who was really nice but seemed to be getting a little flirty.
So she called me over, and said, “oh by the way, this is my spouse turfherder”
And without missing a beat he says, “that’s ok, I don’t get jealous.”
26. When I was working as a valet I brought out a customers car and he handed me a one dollar bill that was folded up to look like a collared shirt as a tip. He then says “I’ll give you the pants later.”
27. “Do you sell wine for a living? ‘Cause I get drunk just from hearing your voice?”
It’s one of the lyrics from a song he loves to listen to, and it still gets me every time.
28. “Hey, do you believe in love at first sight, or should I swing by a couple of more times?”
29. Me: Send picture of cute cat
Me: I know I am… But what do you think of the picture?
30. Come up holding your knee and say: “Excuse me, do you have a band aid?”
They will (most likely) say: “No.”
Your reply: “That’s okay, I just hurt my knee falling for you.”
31. “My friends bet me I wouldn’t talk to the prettiest girl in the bar. Can I buy you a drink with their money?”
32. Apparently, Blaine from Rooster Teeth’s method is to sit at the bar and look sad. Eventually, a girl will come up and ask if he’s ok.
It helps that he’s super ripped, and incredibly good looking, so it probably won’t work for normal schlubs like us.
33. My guy friend was talking to a girl and she mentioned she had her nipples pierced.
His response was, “Oh yeah? Prove it.”
34. “Are you from Japan? Because I want to get in Ja-pants.” I’ve never laughed so hard at a pick up line. I admit I was actually impressed with his efforts.
35. Accidentally said this yesterday, and I wasn’t trying anything.
She was like, “I’ve slept on so many pillows and it’s still so hard to fall asleep, they make no difference.”
I blurted out, “You should try mine.”
36. “I’d take you to the movies but they don’t let snacks in.”
37. Me: Can I have your number?
Her: Sorry I have a boyfriend…
Me: That’s cool I have a math test tomorrow.
Me: Oh, Im sorry, I thought we were naming things we’re going to cheat on.
38. “I like my women like I like my sunglasses, sitting on my face.”
39. I was tailgating once with a rope in the back of my truck. I saw a pretty girl having fun.
Me: “Hey you look pretty sharp! I need you to judge something for me.”
Her: * walks over to my truck * What am I judging?
Me: * pulls the rope out of the bed of my truck * “My pickup line.
That led to me getting laid in the back of said truck.
40. Guy: Hey could you hold something?
Girl: Hold what?
Guy: My hand.
41. “I’m James. Let’s Bond.”
42. Best one I’ve ever said… A guy bought me a drink and I drunk it in a few minutes. He told me I finished my drink quickly. I told him I finish men quickly too!
43. Now, granted, I’ve already been seeing this girl a bit. I called her over and said, “Wow you look so cute and beautiful I just wanna eat you up… and out.”
44. A girl this weekend asked “Do you want to go halfsies on a baby?”
45. Walk up to potential mate, and say the following. “Hey, I need some girl/guy advice. I saw this absolute hottie, and I’m kinda nervous, should I talk to them?” They of course say “yeah, of course! Don’t be shy!” To which you reply “ok, I will introduce myself to them” and you proceed to introduce yourself to them.
46. My roommate said once to a girl: “Have I fucked you before?”
“Well let’s change that”
Proceeded to leave with her
47. Are you my appendix? Because this feeling in my gut makes me want to take you out.
48. I just had a guy ask me if anyone had told me I was hotter than bacon grease today. I give him props for mentioning bacon.
50. “Do you mind if I sit here and hit on you for a while?”