1. When you could spend hours in their company and still miss them as soon as they leave.
2. When you can have normal real-life arguments with them without fearing that they’re going to leave you; knowing that you’re just two people working out differences in life and that ultimately you’re on the same team, not dealing with an unspoken ultimatum.
3. When you’re excited for all the things that scared you to death before. With my ex, something always felt a little bit off and I could never place why but it did. With the man I’m seeing now, it just all fits. I’m not scared to marry him or start a family instead my heart races at the idea that I could be so lucky to spend the rest of this life with him.
4. When you’re together you feel entirely complete. I had some bad relationships before and never felt perfectly happy with any woman. Until I met her, two of us could talk for hours and it’d feel like we’re teenagers again just dreaming and feeling excited about life.
5. When you’re single/not in love – you generally put yourself first because no one else is going to care for you like you will.
When two people love each other equally- they put each other first. It’s almost as if they switch places looking out for each other’s best interests. And that’s a risky thing to do because it often happens that we put the other persons best interests first trusting they will put us first in exchange as well but they end up keeping an element of selfishness not fully surrendering their power resulting in a one-sided relationship where one person feels like they aren’t getting their 100%.
And that is the difference between “love” and “true love” – when the exchange of power is equal and complete.
6. When even the things that suck–illness, car problems, putting together IKEA furniture, etc.–become bearable with them around.
7. When you can sit next to them in complete silence and not have to fill it. You can just be comfortable being with each other.
Also when you laugh about your farts together.
8. When you start treating the other person like your “second-self.” Their needs and wants are just as, if not more, important than your own.
9. When you’re willing to take their feelings into account above your own. It can be something small. I would have ‘relationships’ where I couldn’t be bothered to go and see them … and when I met the one I knew it because I was willing to go out of my comfort zone to accommodate their needs.
10. When you ignore the other person’s flaws, its a crush.
When you love being with a person despite their flaws, its love.
11. When you do not wish to change them or make them conform to your will in any way.
When you accept the fact that you may not spend the rest of your life together, and you acknowledge that if they ever needed to move on that you would let them go without any feelings of guilt.
When they break your heart, but even though you are so hurt by them you still forgive them.
Honestly, it’s pretty cliche, but when you can truly abide by the vows of marriage: for richer or poorer, through thick and thin, in sickness and in health, through good times and bad, until death do you part. Way too many people enter into marriage without understanding the great power of the oath that you SWEAR to them and the sacrifice that this entails.
12. When you simply can’t imagine life without them. When they become that one constant. You may try to imagine your future dozens of different ways, but in each reality they’re there with you.
13. When they get sick and you aren’t repulsed by holding a bucket as they vomit, and then help them clean their face afterwards.
14. When going to groceries or pumping gas seems like an adventure with him,
When we could laugh and laugh and fart and be ourselves.
When after arguing we would lower down our ego, say sorry and find back each other because we always hold on.
When I never feel lonely, even when he’s not here physically.
When being with them just feels… better.
Love is ultimately finding someone who loves us for who we really are, doing the same for the, being committed through all the inevitable rough patches and enjoying being together,
15. When you are having the shittiest day but you can just breeze through it because you know you will get to see that person after.
16. When you’re truly in love, you realize friendship is what matters most. All the romantic stuff is just an after thought. True love isn’t some fiery romp full of roses and romantic dinners. It’s just hanging out with your best friend in the entire world. It’s watching dumb shows together. It’s getting drunk and being idiots together. It’s pigging out on your favorite foods together. You spend all day in your pj’s and looking like crap together, and you still think they are the most beautiful and awesome person in the world. Also, you stop seeing their flaws as such, and recognize that they are simply part of who they are. They form the grooves and ridges of their personality, and make them unique. You love their flaws just as much as you love everything else. You can’t just cherry pick the best parts someone’s personality and say you love them.
17. When you simply want to be with them and just their presence makes you happy. When no matter what you do together, even if its something you would normally find boring, is fun to do. When just hearing them laugh and knowing their happy and content makes your heart leap with joy.
18. When the need for them in your life persists when you are mad at them.
19. When something happens in your day and the first thought is how much the other person would enjoy this story. And not just big exciting life changing events, just seeing a funny license plate or a cute dog, or a tree trunk that looked like a butt. When everything you experience makes you want to run and tell that person asap.
20. When it’s just easy. Not matter all the little arguments and bickers. Being around them you can be your self and feel safe.
21. When my driving thought is that I want that person to be happy and fulfilled I know it’s love. It’s not necessary to be the source of their fulfillment or the focus of their attention, I just want them to achieve joy.
22. When you spend all day thinking about them and doing things like, “I wonder if my SO would like this or do this?” And all you want is to be by their side again.
23. When the thought of spending the rest of your life with them seems inviting rather than terrifying.
24. When you’re always searching for ways to show how much you love them because just saying it isn’t enough. You just repeat “I love you”s like an idiot, and it’s not really enough.
Maybe even being afraid sometimes. Intimacy is scary, and being truly open to someone else can be hard. Love is acknowledging that fear, but doing it anyway because you care for them that much.
25. When their name pops up at least a couple times a day when you’re not with them at the moment.
26. When you’re willing to change yourself so that they can feel and care about you the way that you feel and care about them.
27. When someone asks you why you like them and you can name a bunch of thing without thinking about it. When you like them for who they are not just for how they look.
28. When you’re never content around other people, always itching to leave, but you are home with them.
When the idea of being someone they wouldn’t like scares you so much you have to change your life.
29. It’s really hard to get the motivation to make meals for myself, but it’s easy to make something for her.
30. When you genuinely care about someone’s feelings and emotions and their wellbeing.
When the thought of them disappearing brings you to tears.
When you’re with them, everything feels right in the world.
31. When the idea of spending time with them doing the most mundane things is so much more appealing than spending lots of money to go out to bars and meet new people.
32. When you feel “complete” when you’re together and their world becomes your world.
33. When no matter what you do, how small it is, your first thought is to tell them or wish they were there.
34. When you choose to care for them even when it’s hard or isn’t fun. When you can put aside how you feel in the moment, remind yourself why they’re worth it, and choose to make them feel loved.
35. When they can handle your ugly crying, panic attack state, and bring you down from it and calm you.
36. When you have to wonder if you’re in love you’re not. When you found out you are in love for the first time ever and all the other times were just crushes, then you’re in love.
37. When they’re the first thought you have in the morning… and the last thought you have at night.
When looking them in the eyes gives you butterflies in your stomach, and when the thought of a world without them feels hollow and incomplete…
38. When your heart literally MOVES in your chest when you see him looking for you.
39. When you prefer them to be happy and comfortable, even when it inconveniences you and makes you miserable.
When you become friends, just so you can talk, but refuse to ask them out in any way, shape or form because it might embarrass them.
When any scrap of stuff they’ve made, art or otherwise, is worth it’s weight in gold and more to you.
When seeing them smiling and chatting with one of their friends in the hallway, even just a glimpse, makes your day.
When you don’t care if they’re considered ugly by others, and still view them as the most beautiful person who’s lived.
When you fantasize about them, dating them, and just hanging out even when you aren’t horny.
When you like them for who they are, not what they are.
40. When it’s a lot harder to sleep without their snoring than with their absurdly loud snoring.
41. When you’re not with them because they check all the right boxes. In fact, at first you can’t make sense of it because the only reason you have is you want to be with them. You want to love them.
Don’t just go with who “makes sense” because love rarely “makes sense.” I’ve learned to accept that sometimes there is no explanations, just an inexplicable and near cosmic pull to another person.
42. When the thought of life without that person literally scares the ever living shit out of you.
43. When songs start to make sense…
44. When being with her feels like home and you don’t have anywhere else you could possibly want to go.
45. When you find someone you aren’t trying so hard around. When you’re young, you think that thing making you act like someone else is “love”. When you mature you realize that when it really is love, you don’t feel like you’re being someone else. Sometimes you hate that you are so… well… you, but you marvel at the fact that you put on no pretenses and they stayed anyway.
46. You know you’re in love when you aren’t questioning it. You care and are concerned about their health, happiness, relationships, goals etc. You do things with them and for them because you want to not because they want you to or society wants you to. You put them before yourself and you actually enjoy it.
47. When you start saying their name out loud when you’re alone just to remind yourself about how their name sounds…
And then being embarrassed about the fact that you just said their name out loud
48. When you realize that, with this particular woman, it is definitely hoes before bros.
49. When you find yourself simply enjoying their presence no matter what the circumstances.
50. When the word “love” makes you think of them and you’re fervently searching through these comments to see if anything matches how you feel about this person.