This is what I’ll need from him: He will need to be direct. Direct like the little me that when I was in grade 4 got on my bike with a bushel of purple lilacs, homemade cookies and my journal full of love notes about Mark Vandrunen (we had matching birth marks so I decided we were soulmates) and peddled over to his house. I knocked on that door and gave him all my gifts (including my journal).
He’s going to need to have done the work to be at home in his souls shoes—he’s going to need to know about emotional intelligence. Not just know, he’s going to need to be a master in it to keep up with my empathetic, sensitive and intrinsic awareness of humans and relationships.
He’s going to need to have done the work to heal his wounds—for we are all dropped as children on our hearts and make it about us and I want a man who knows where he pusses and why. I want his wounds to have grey hair, for he has sat with them and understands them. I don’t wish a man who is discovering the work, I want a man who has finished and is sitting quietly to discover me.
He will be generous, and have a heart for animals and this earth.
He will not just be in a love story with me, but with this whole world—he will look with kindness and presence at the server, or the flight attendant or the taxi driver and give them the attention and care he gives me. He will be a man of courage—not just in adventure and risk but in emotional courage.
He will be grounded, with feet that are roots like a cedar tree and let me rest my superwoman head in his lap.
He will love my fire—and my intensity, he will watch me like a forest fire and smile for he understand that I need that to create change.
He will see my intensity as a great gift, for intensity is confidence in intention.
He will be able to fly with me—and walk beside me.
He will love the sea—even if we don’t play in it together and understand that the sea is how I balance and nourish myself and so we will live by the water together.
He will watch lovingly how I walk in this world.
He will be secure, loving and kind. We will have a dog, and our life will be quieter than it is loud, and we will like it like that.